


can you give me a hint?

by Idnis



Category: Life Is Strange 2 (Video Game)
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Boys In Love, Canon Compliant, Flashbacks, Holding Hands, M/M, Mutual Pining, Prom, School Dances, Sleepovers, oblivious boys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-26
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:47:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 22,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22576570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Idnis/pseuds/Idnis
Summary: In just three weeks, Daniel is going away to college. Which means time is running out. If Chris wants to tell Daniel about the massive crush he's had on him for years, he'd better do it now. But should he? What if Daniel doesn't feel the same?
Relationships: Daniel Diaz/Chris Eriksen
Comments: 77
Kudos: 112





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi lovely people!
> 
> I'm so flipping excited to share this with you! I've been absolutely obsessed with lis2 and I wanted so badly to write something for it. And, well, the trope childhood friends ALWAYS gets me. 
> 
> Enjoy reading!

The hug feels like Chris is going to choke,   
and yet it’s still not enough.  
  
“Hey, I’ll see you tomorrow,” Daniel laughs, patting Chris on the back. “Why are you acting like you’re never gonna see me again? I literally live next door.”   
  
For 8 years, they've been neighbours.  
For 8 years, Chris has been able to sneak into his tree house, look at Daniel’s house, and wonder what he’s doing.  
For 8 years, they’ve been not only neighbours,   
but classmates,  
and best friends.  
  
But.   
  
“Dude,” Chris says, “you’re going away for college in three weeks! This could be our last hug _for months_.”  
  
Chris makes sure to sound like he’s only half-joking, but Daniel picks up that something's off because he falls silent.  
  
It makes the hug kind of awkward.  
  
“Okay, Superwolf,” Chris says, and he leans back. He makes sure he plasters a smile on his face when he says, “See you tomorrow.”  
  
“Chris,” Daniel starts, frowning. “I’m going to visit you loads. You know that, right?”  
  
Yes, he does.  
But compared to seeing his best friend every day, it’s a sucky thought to know he’s only going to see Daniel once every few months.  
Because it makes sense for Daniel to get busy with school work. It makes sense for Daniel to want to spend his breaks in his dorm, because he’s going to build a life there. Because he’s going to make new friends there.  
  
But because Chris is genuinely happy for his best friend, all he says is, “I know. No worries.”   
  
“Yeah,” Daniel says, his frown smoothing away. “No worries.”  
  
Obviously, as soon as Daniel has jumped over the broken part of the little fence separating their houses,   
Chris goes right back to worrying.  
  
x  
  
His room is a mess.  
  
Stuff from their sleepover is still lying all over his floor, but it’s all empty.  
Empty bags of chips,  
empty coke cans,  
and an empty mattress with rumpled blankets, lying next to Chris’s bed.  
  
With a sigh, Chris starts stripping the blankets of their bedding.  
  
When they were younger, they used to sleep in the same bed during sleepovers. It was uncomfortable because Daniel was always running way too hot _and_ hogging all the blankets, which should’ve been perfect but it was not.  
It just turned into this awkward dance where Chris was either too hot or too cold.  
  
When Chris was fourteen, he asked his father for a bigger bed.  
  
It would solve the sleeping together problem, or so he thought.  
But then the whole puberty thing started not too soon after, and waking up with a _you know_ … while sharing the bed with your best friend was kind of awkward.  
  
Especially when you found out your, uh, awkward dreams were all about your best friend.  
  
The front door closes with a bang.  
  
“Chris?” his dad calls from the living room. “I’m back. Is Daniel still there?”  
  
“For now,” Chris mutters, before shoving the mattress back under his bed. He gathers the bedding in his arms and goes to greet his dad.  
  
His dad is in the kitchen, putting away the groceries. Chris spots a few vegetables in his passing. That’s good.  
  
“Hi kid,” his father says. “How was your sleepover?”  
  
“Fun.”  
  
“I’ll bet. I could hear you boys talking until two.”  
  
“Why were you still awake?”  
  
Chris doesn’t mean for his voice to sound slightly worried, but it happens, and of course his dad hears. He turns and crosses his arms.  
  
“I was awake because two teenage boys were talking so loudly all night,” he says, giving Chris a look.  
  
Chris sticks out his tongue. “Yeah, okay. So what are we eating tonight?”  
  
“I was thinking maybe some stir-fry?”  
  
“Sounds good.”  
  
His father nods and goes back to putting away the groceries.   
  
About two years ago, they decided they would start eating healthier.   
  
_Say goodbye to microwave meals and hello to cooking shows._ _  
_  
Chris continues towards the washing machine. He opens the door and quickly turns on the light before the monsters can sneak up on him. Not that Daniel would ever let that happen. Smiling to himself, Chris puts the bedding in the washing machine and adds an extra dash of washing powder.  
  
x  
  
_four years ago  
  
_“Wow, your bed is _huge_ ,” Daniel exclaims, a second before he lets himself fall on it. “Seriously, this could probably fit three people.”  
  
Chris giggles and jumps on the bed, taking care not to hit Daniel in the face. “No more blanket fights!”   
  
“Hey, you don’t have proof. Maybe _you_ are the blanket hogger.”  
  
“Yeah, right. It would sooner be Snowmancer than me!” Chris exclaims, jumping up and down.   
  
It makes Daniel bounce on the bed too. He laughs. “This is like being in a bouncy castle. But aren’t you going to ruin your bed like this?”  
  
“Nah.”   
  
“Okay, if you say so.” Daniel moves to his feet and starts jumping too. The bed creaks a little now. But it’s not too bad.  
  
When Chris is tired and panting, he lets himself fall on the bed. Daniel immediately joins him.  
  
“That was fun,” Chris grins.  
  
“Yeah.”   
  
Chris spreads his arms like a starfish. “Look how far I can stretch in this bed.”  
  
Daniel bats away his arm. “Hey, I’m still here.”  
  
“Let’s read comics together,” Chris suggests, sitting up. “Or we could watch a movie. Or we could draw ourselves as superheroes.”  
  
He always suggests the last one,  
but as always, Daniel’s face falls.  
  
“Yeah, let’s read comics together,” Daniel quickly says. “I’m in the mood for Hawt Dawg Man.”   
  
“I could draw him for you.”  
  
“No, that’s okay. I want to read.”   
  
Not wanting his best friend to be sad, Chris nods and goes to get his comics. When he gets back, Daniel is still lying in the exact same position. Daniel’s staring at the ceiling, and his eyes are shiny, like he’s about to cry.  
  
“I got the comics,” Chris says quietly.  
  
Daniel quickly sits up. He smiles, but it looks kinda fake. “Awesome!”   
  
x  
  
_three weeks until The Truck of Destruction  
  
_“I swear this is your actual superpower,” Chris mumbles, leaning his head on his hand as he watches Daniel slice an onion without crying.   
  
It's a familiar sight,   
Daniel in his kitchen.  
  
Two years ago, after Chris had announced his dad and him were going to eat healthier, Daniel had offered up his services.  
He said he could never beat Claire with his cooking, but maybe if he practiced enough, he’d be able to beat Chris’s dad.  
  
_“Besides,” Daniel had said, “I’ll need to know how to cook when I’m in college.”_  
  
“Nah, it’s just something I’ve done for years and years,” Daniel says. “When Sean had to cook, he always made me cut the onions because he hated it.”  
  
The words are easy.   
It’s the memory that makes it hard.   
Chris knows that.  
He carefully watches Daniel’s reaction to determine his own, but nothing happens. Daniel just keeps cutting onions.  
_  
_ “But how can you not cry?” Chris asks.   
  
Daniel’s movements stop. He hums, a little sound he’s probably unaware of making. “I keep looking at the future,” he says eventually, and _oh._   
  
Chris feels like an insensitive dumbass.   
Of course, Daniel had still been in his kitchen in Seattle, cutting onions to help his big brother. Of course Daniel had been thinking about Sean.  
  
“Do you… need help with the onions?” Chris asks carefully, trying to make up for his dumb question. “If you don’t like cutting them, I can do it.”   
  
“Nah,” Daniel says. He looks over his shoulder and gives Chris a grin that makes Chris’s heart stop. “Tonight, I’m cooking for you.”   
  
Within the blink of an eye, Chris’s cheeks are _flaming_.  
  
“Yeah, uh, thanks as always,” Chris mumbles, ducking his head to avoid looking like a _total_ douche. To avoid looking like a total lovestruck douche.  
  
“Jeez,” Daniel says, “we need to redye your hair. Your roots are bad, man.”  
  
Chris quickly he covers the top of his head with his hands. “Hey, no fair! I never comment on your ripped jeans.”  
  
“That’s ‘cause they look cool on me.”  
  
“Uhh, you wish.”   
  
“Oh, yeah? How come Samantha Hunt asked me to her going-away party, huh?”  
  
_Wait, what?  
  
_Samantha Hunt is, or well, was one of the popular girls in Beaver Creek high. A lot of guys at school talked about wanting to get with her. In a way, it was partly thanks to her that Chris realized he had no interest in getting anywhere with girls.   
  
“For real?” Chris asks, ignoring the pang of jealousy in his chest. “Are you going?”  
  
Daniel shrugs. “Dunno. I might.”  
  
“When’s the party?”  
  
“In three weeks. Just a few days before I leave.”  
  
Chris stares at the table, at the few discolorations on its surface, at the dent near the left corner where his father had smashed a plate in anger.  
He wonders if he should ask Daniel to stay.  
It’s unrealistic to expect Daniel to stay in Beaver Creek forever, Chris knows it is, but the thought of not seeing Daniel again...  
  
Chris’s stomach turns and he feels nauseous.  
  
“So…” Daniel says, breaking the silence. “You want to go with me?”  
  
The words are familiar.   
  
They blast Chris back to the past,   
back to two years ago, when all of Beaver Creek High had been buzzing with excitement and nerves because there was a school dance and who was going to ask who.  
Back to one year ago, when Chris had been dreading the dance because Daniel had had a girlfriend and Chris so did not want to go and watch them kiss.  
Back to a few months ago, when the school had practically been deserted and Daniel’s sneakers had squeaked on the linoleum floor.  
  
“We don’t have to go,” Daniel says, and Chris realizes he’s been quiet for too long.  
  
_Pay attention, dude._ _  
_ Samantha Hunt’s going-away party.  
  
“Uh, yeah, okay!” Chris says. “If you want to,” he adds, like a chicken.  
  
“Yeah, could be fun, right?”   
  
Chris looks up, but Daniel’s back is turned to him again.  
The sound of the knife hitting the cutting board fills the kitchen. Chris watches the muscles shift underneath Daniel’s simple black shirt and feels his face grow warm.  
  
“Okay,” Chris says, before he starts to daydream. “Guess I’ll have to bust out the dance moves again.”  
  
Daniel turns and gives him a big smile. “Aww, yes. Haven’t seen those in a while.”   
  
x  
  
_two years ago, the day before the dance  
  
_Chris looks at his reflection in the bathroom mirror.   
Believe it or not, but looking in the mirror has always been a struggle at school. He doesn’t want people to think he’s looking at the urinals.   
You know... at other guys’ _things_.  
  
So, uh, anyway.  
  
The school dance.  
It’s a big thing. The biggest thing of the year.   
If not of his life.  
  
Chris looks at himself in the mirror and wonders if anyone would want to go to the dance with him. He knows who he wants to go with.  
But that’s not really an option.  
He’ll have to find someone else. Only problem is, even if he would find another boy attractive like that, it still wouldn’t be okay to go with a boy to the dance, right?  
  
Even though it’s 2023 and a lot of people on the internet are openly gay, it’s not really a thing here in Beaver Creek.  
Sometimes it seems like everyone in Beaver Creek is straight.  
  
“Why is straight always the default?” Chris murmurs.  
  
Of course that’s the moment Daniel is done peeing and joins Chris at the sinks.   
  
“What?”  
  
Chris’s cheeks heat up. He hopes Daniel doesn’t recognize the quote from _Love, Simon_ , a movie about a gay kid.   
He probably doesn’t.  
They almost always watch movies together, but this one Chris watched alone. In secret.  
  
“Nothing,” Chris says quickly. “Just wondering who I should ask to the dance. Since it’s, you know, tomorrow.”  
  
Daniel pulls a face. “Ugh, don’t remind me. I haven’t asked anyone.”   
  
The thought fills Chris’s head before he can stop it.  
  
_What if we went together?  
  
__Come on,_ Chris thinks, while he’s casually drying his hands. _Why don’t you suggest you go together?  
  
_“Do you want to go with me?” Daniel asks.  
  
Chris drops his paper towel.  
It flutters to the ground without a sound,   
not that Chris can hear anything but the wild pounding in his heart.   
  
Daniel is looking at him, face neutral. Maybe a little curious.  
  
“What?” Chris asks. His voice sounds too high.  
  
“Do you want to go with me?” Daniel repeats. “I mean, we both haven’t asked anyone, so we could just go together, you know.”  
  
_Holy crap._ _  
__Do I have super powers after all?_  
  
“Uh,” Chris says. “Don’t you think that would be, uh, weird?”  
  
“Weird?” Daniel asks, and he sounds genuinely surprised. Like the thought didn’t even cross his mind.  
  
“Never mind,” Chris mumbles.  
  
“So do you want to go together?”  
  
Standing in a gross boys’ toilet with wet hands,   
Chris nods lamely.  
  
Daniel smiles. “Awesome. I was _so_ worried I had to go alone.”  
  
He turns his back to Chris to dry his hands,   
and it’s not nearly enough time for Chris to pull himself together.   
He manages though, just barely.  
  
“You’re not,” Chris says quickly. “You’re never going to be alone. Not while Captain Spirit is here.”  
  
Daniel turns to him in surprise. Then he laughs. “My superhero.”  
  
x  
  
_less than three but not yet two weeks until The Truck of Destruction  
  
_“Dude, you always pick the weirdest ice cream flavors,” Chris laughs, as he looks at the monster that is Daniel’s ice cream.  
  
“They add new flavours every month. I have to taste them all!”   
  
Which is why they get an ice cream at Danny’s Ice Cream Parlor every month.  
If you can still call the weird mix of flavours in Daniel’s cone an ice cream.  
  
“They probably have a lot more flavours in San Diego.”   
  
The words are out of Chris’s mouth before Daniel can take a bite of his ice cream.   
  
Daniel closes his mouth.   
He lowers his ice cream.  
  
“I guess,” he says quietly.  
  
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to—That sounded stupid, I’m sorry.”  
  
Daniel stares at his ice cream.  
It's melting slowly, it’s summer after all, but he makes no move to save his ice cream. Something that looks a lot like frustration crosses Daniel’s face, and it makes Chris feel awful.  
  
“Daniel—” he starts.  
  
“No, you’re right, they probably have more flavors in San Diego,” Daniel interrupts him. He frowns. “They probably have more ice cream shops too. They probably—no, for sure, they have more of everything there. But you know what they don’t have?”  
  
Chris swallows.  
His own ice cream is dripping on his fingers now, but he doesn’t move.  
  
“You." Daniel looks at him. "They don’t have you there.”  
  
Eyes wide, heart beating fast, Chris stares at Daniel.   
Something fills the air between them, something that’s not new, but still very unexplored.   
Like the top of a mountain, always visible in the corner of your eye.  
  
“This is our thing, okay?” Daniel says. “I’m not going to enjoy a new flavour of ice cream without you.”  
  
Chris feels like he might cry.  
But superheroes don’t cry, so he blinks back the tears and smiles.  
  
“I guess we better start eating then.” He looks down at their ice creams, both of which are running down their hands and dripping on the ground like sweet tears. “Before the sun’s eaten it all.”  
  
Daniel smiles too. “The sun won’t win. We’re Superwolf and Captain Spirit. We’re unbeatable.”  
  
They exchange a look, and then they both start licking the melting, sticky ice cream off their hands. It probably looks super weird, but Chris doesn’t care. He loves being weird with Daniel, and he loves that Daniel seems to love it too.  
  
Chris looks at Daniel.  
Which turns out to be a mistake.  
  
Daniel is already looking at him.  
When their eyes lock, Daniel grins, then slowly licks a line of ice cream off his hand.   
  
The smile falls off Chris’s face. His throat feels dry, and his jeans grow uncomfortably tight.   
It’s bad. Very bad.  
  
“ _Mmm_ ,” Daniel says, licking his lips. “This is a good flavour.”  
  
_Holy crap_.   
  
Cheeks red, Chris laughs awkwardly. What’s he supposed to say? He quickly takes a big bite off his ice cream to avoid blurting out something awkward.  
  
“Whoa,” Daniel says. “You’re supposed to lick the ice cream. Not eat it.”  
  
“Shut up,” Chris mumbles, wiping his mouth with his hand. He can’t look at Daniel’s handsome face right now. “It was just, uh, melting super fast.”  
  
“See?” Daniel says. “That’s why it’s the best idea ever to eat ice cream in the winter.”  
  
At the mention of their age-old argument that neither has won, Chris feels relieved.   
In the face of such a terrible and embarrassing situation, he’s more than willing to give up the battle to save his face.  
  
“Yeah, yeah, okay,” he says. “You’re right.”  
  
x  
  
_one year ago  
  
_“You were right,” Daniel sighs. “Sophie and I don’t work. We broke up”  
  
Chris nearly chokes on his cafeteria lunch. “Just now?”  
  
“Yup.”  
  
With a _clang_ , Daniel drops his lunch tray on the table and sits down. Chris doesn’t know what to say. He’s trying very hard not to grin, because that would be totally inappropriate, but _wow._ He’s actually so happy he feels like fist-pumping the air.  
  
Instead he clears his throat and says, “That’s… sad.”   
  
Daniel stops eating his hamburger for a second, then he shrugs. “Nah, not really.”  
  
“O-Oh?”  
  
“You said it yourself. We don’t have anything in common.”  
  
“But I thought she read comics.”   
  
Daniel takes another bite of his hamburger. As always, his bites are too huge. It’s like he’s permanently starving, and every meal he has is the first one in a long time.  
  
Chris wonders if it’s something left over from his time in the wolf pack.  
  
“Yeah,” Daniel says with a full mouth. “She does. I’m not saying she isn’t nice, but I dunno. I have more fun when I’m with you.”  
  
Chris feels his cheeks heat up. “But she’s your girlfriend. She’s not supposed to be me.”   
  
Daniel gives him a strange look.  
And honestly, what is Chris doing? Is he trying to change Daniel’s mind? He should be happy Daniel and Sophie broke up. Now he doesn’t have to look at them holding hands again, or watch Sophie laugh about every little thing Daniel says. Even though Daniel can be super funny.  
  
“That doesn’t make sense,” Daniel says. There’s a little bit of sauce on the corner of his mouth. Chris wants to brush it away. “If I don’t have fun hanging out with her, I shouldn’t be with her.” Daniel looks at his hamburger in thought. “I thought if I got a girlfriend, I would be normal.”   
  
“What?” Chris asks, surprised and slightly offended too. Daniel is a superhero. _His_ superhero. “But you’re not normal. That’s what so awesome about you.”   
  
Daniel smiles. He looks up at Chris, and his eyes are soft. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess you’re right.”  
  
x  
  
_two weeks until The Truck of Destruction_  
  
It’s late at night, and Chris should be asleep but he’s not.  
  
Staring at the ceiling, he keeps thinking about his future, about his application to Pomona, about what the hell he’s supposed to do with his life when he doesn’t get in.  
And then there’s the teeny tiny bit where Pomona is only a two hour drive from San Diego. It would mean seeing Daniel way more than if he went to a state college in Colorado.   
  
But what if he _does_ get into Pomona? He’d be making art every day. It’s something that he loves, but would that be enough? Can you even make a decent wage as an artist?  
  
Chris’s head hurts.  
  
He should sleep, but he doesn’t feel tired.  
Just stressed.  
  
His hand itches towards his phone, but he knows he shouldn’t. Mindless scrolling never helped anyone. With a sigh, Chris gets out of bed and tiptoes through the house to the front door.   
He puts on shoes and quietly slips out of the house.  
  
It’s still warm outside.   
  
Chris goes to his tree house. As always as he sets his foot on the second step, he feels a thrill shoot through his body.  
He has felt the thrill ever since that day nine years ago, when the rung broke and he felt himself falling, falling, falling,  
until he was suddenly floating above the snow, his cape billowing behind him.  
  
And that was how he met the most amazing person in the entire universe.  
  
The memory makes Chris smile.  
  
He climbs the ladder and hoists himself onto the small platform. A few old toys still lie around here that he couldn’t throw away. And of course there’s his secret stash, a.k.a. a box with comic strips of his mom, his baseball cards, a few old school letters that he should probably throw away, and a few pictures of him and Daniel.  
Including the one of their senior prom, when Claire had suddenly insisted they take a proper photo together, not just goofy ones.  
  
As if them going to prom together was not just a joke,  
but something  
_real_.  
  
Chris picks up the photo.  
  
It’s taken inside the Reynolds’ living room, near the fireplace. Daniel’s arm is around Chris’s waist, pulling Chris firmly against him. Their heads are tilted towards each other, and there’s a smile on Daniel’s face that looks so warm it makes Chris’s stomach swirl, even now.  
  
Of course, in the photo, Chris is blushing, the tips of his ears as red as can be.   
  
Still. It’s a very cute photo.  
And it looks real.  
  
When Claire had shown them the photos, a week or so later, Chris had casually said he really liked that one and if Claire was thinking about developing these, he wouldn’t mind having a copy. Just totally casual.  
It was less casual of Claire to develop the photo for herself, frame it, and put it on the small table in their living room.  
  
A sudden light in the corner of his eye makes Chris look up.  
The light in Daniel’s bedroom just went on.  
  
He sees a dark silhouette move towards the curtains. Chris debates whether or not he should hide, but in the end he just stays where he is. Daniel opens the curtains and his window and then he waves.  
  
He’s not wearing a shirt.  
It’s a thing Daniel stopped doing during the summer when he turned 16, and it made sleepovers simultaneously more fun and more stressful.  
  
Chris waves back.  
  
Daniel ducks out of sight for a moment, and when he returns, he’s looking down at something in his han—  
Chris’s phone lights up.  
  
[Daniel]  
u ok? should i come over?  
  
[Chris]  
nah, i’m just having a midlife crisis  
  
[Chris]  
dont want to bum you out  
  
[Daniel]  
i don’t mind   
  
[Daniel]  
superwolf is a super listener :D  
  
Chris laughs.  
  
[Chris]  
omg that was bad  
  
[Daniel]  
>:( i heard you laughing!!  
  
[Chris]  
fair enough  
  
[Daniel]  
on my way, don’t move ♡  
  
Like he could.  
The way Chris’s stomach swirls after reading the message makes it impossible to move anyway.  
  
x  
  
The wood creaks when Daniel lets himself fall on it.  
  
When they were younger, Chris had never once doubted it would hold. Now, though. After all those ice creams. After Daniel started lightly working out.  
  
“Glad you put on a shirt,” Chris says, then immediately panics. _Why did I say that?_ Guys don’t focus on that; not with other guys, at least.  
  
Judging from Daniel’s raised eyebrows, he also thinks it’s weird.   
  
“You, uh, don’t want to be sick before you go to college,” Chris tries to save himself. “That would be, uh, super bad luck!”  
  
Daniel still looks skeptical. Chris wants to look away, but that would make him seem guilty or something, so he endures it.  
  
“Yeah, you’re right,” Daniel says slowly. “That would be bad.”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
For some reason, the silence between them is awkward. Chris is afraid it’s his fault, so he opens his mouth to talk about something, _anything,_ else, but Daniel beats him to it.   
  
“So what were you thinking about?”  
  
Chris’s mouth snaps shut.  
If he were a real superhero,  
he would say,  
_you_.  
But he’s not.  
  
“School,” he sighs. “What if I don’t get into Pomona?”   
  
“Chris, we’ve talked about this. You’ll get in. Your art is super awesome, they’d be fools to turn you down.”   
  
“But what if I _do_ get in?” Chris whispers.  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
“I mean, what am I going to do when I have a degree in art? There aren’t a lot of jobs for artists.”   
  
Without a warning, Daniel reaches for Chris’s hand and grabs it. It’s a thing he started doing more often after senior prom.  
  
“You can always be a barista,” Daniel says seriously.   
  
It deflates some of the despair that has been building in Chris’s chest. He laughs. “Real helpful.”  
  
“No, I’m somewhat serious.” Daniel sits up. “You can always get a part time job while you’re applying to better jobs. Make some money while you work on your craft, you know?”  
  
“That’s… not a bad idea.”  
  
“I know,” Daniel grins.  
  
“I just don’t want to be making coffee forever,” Chris mumbles.   
  
Daniel squeezes his hand. Chris’s heart skips a beat. “You won’t. I promise.”  
  
“You can’t promise that,” Chris laughs.  
  
“Sure I can. I’m Super Wolf, remember? I can do anything I set my mind to.”  
  
“Oh, yeah? Except find a date for your senior prom, huh.”   
  
“Hey!” Daniel shoots up and leans close to Chris. He’s frowning, and it looks adorable. “Shut up, I had the best date to prom.”   
  
Chris knows he’s blushing.  
He also knows he should laugh it off, lean back and let go of Daniel’s hand,   
but he doesn’t do any of those things.  
  
Instead he keeps looking at Daniel’s handsome face and wishes he had the guts to close the distance between their lips.   
Even if Daniel was disgusted by it, it would still be a better kiss than that disaster with Mikey Jones behind the gym building.  
  
Chris had been so heartbroken over Daniel getting a girlfriend, over him getting his first kiss by someone else _and_ sooner than Chris. It was all so sucky, and Chris had hoped that kissing Mikey Jones would make it less sucky.  
  
It hadn’t.  
  
While they were kissing, Chris kept wondering if this was what Daniel did with Sophie, and if kissing Daniel would feel like… this.   
Like brushing your teeth.  
  
_Super gross_.

His thoughts must’ve showed on his face, because fear flickers across Daniel’s face, which doesn’t make sense, and then Daniel leans back.  
  
“Anyway,” Daniel says, and his voice sounds a little rough.   
  
“You okay? Sure you’re not getting sick?”  
  
“Yeah, uh.” Daniel lets go of Chris’s hand and looks away. If Chris didn’t know better, he could swear Daniel was blushing. “Maybe I’m a little chilly.”   
  
“We should go back.”  
  
Chris starts moving towards the ladder. His leg is already on the first rung when Daniel calls out, “Chris?”   
  
“Yeah?”   
  
“Can I sleep with you tonight?”   
  
It’s better to say no, Chris knows. He should get slowly accustomed to not seeing Daniel as much. Not being together so often.   
But he’s bad at this.   
Bad at saying goodbye to Daniel.   
  
“Yeah, of course,” Chris says.  
  
Daniel smiles, and it makes Chris’s chest feel warm. “Thanks.”   
  
x

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next time; WHAT DO I WANT TO BE WHEN I GROW UP?
> 
> Thank you so, so much for reading! I really hope you had fun :) Let me know what you thought of the first chapter, if you want! The idea of Chris dyeing his hair (seriously what is that verb) came from seeing [grantyort's art](https://grantyort.tumblr.com/) on tumblr and I really liked it! 
> 
> Oh, and you can follow me on tumblr (idnis) or twitter (idnis9)!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovely people!!
> 
> I'm so excited to share the next chapter with you! It made me hurt while writing it, so... 
> 
> Enjoy!

_eight years ago  
  
_ The classroom is yellow and green.  
Yellow, because of the tables and chairs and their school books.   
Green, because of the tall grass painted onto the walls.  
  
Their teacher, Mrs. Brown, is writing on the board with a yellow crayon. Her handwriting is very pretty; it has lots of curls and loops.  
  
Beside Chris, Daniel is fiddling with a piece of paper. It seems like he’s trying to fold a frog, but so far, it’s not working.   
  
“Okay, class!” Mrs. Brown says with a smile. “Today, we’re going to think about our futures.”   
  
She taps on the board, at the words that are written there in loopy yellow: WHAT DO I WANT TO BE WHEN I GROW UP?  
  
“Who already has an idea?”   
  
Hands shoot up. A few seats from Chris, Aaron is bouncing on his chair in excitement, his hand stretched so high it looks like an invisible giant is pulling on it.  
  
“Yes, Aaron?”  
  
“An astronaut!”  
  
Chris wonders if there are invisible giants, and if they might be the cause of traffic jams. What if they get tired of walking around, and just need to sit down for a while?  
  
“What about you, Beverly?”   
  
“I’d like to be a cook, Mrs. Brown.”   
  
“Oh, that’s nice! I’d love to try out one of your recipes.”  
  
It would be nice if dad was good at cooking, Chris thinks. He’s getting a little sick of all those microwave dinners. Not that he’d tell his dad that. His dad already has a lot on his plate.   
  
“And what about, hmm… What about you, Daniel?”   
  
Next to Chris, Daniel shoots upright like someone electrocuted him.   
  
“Uh, me?” Daniel looks behind him, obviously stalling. “Uh, I dunno.”   
  
Mrs. Brown frowns. “Nothing?”   
  
Daniel shrugs.  
  
Somehow, shrugging is even worse than saying _I dunno_ , because Mrs. Brown’s frown deepens. She takes a step forward. “There must be _something,_ Daniel…”   
  
“Not really,” Daniel says, shifting in his seat again. He seems uncomfortable. Maybe Chris should save him.  
  
“I’d like to be a superhero, Mrs. Brown!” Chris speaks up.  
  
Mrs. Brown gives him a small smile. “That’s admirable, but I wasn’t asking you, Chris. I was asking Daniel.”   
  
“Jeez, I said I don’t know,” Daniel says, and now he’s also frowning.  
  
“Daniel! That’s not how you speak to me.”   
  
“But you aren’t listening!”   
  
Daniel’s pencil flies off his desk,   
even though no one touched it.  
  
Mrs. Brown takes another step closer. “It’s a simple question, Daniel. Everyone here has a dream, something they’d like to do. What is—”  
  
Daniel shoves his chair back and moves to his feet. The classroom lights flicker on and off. “But I’m not like everyone. I’m not a fucking kid anymore—”  
  
“ _Daniel!_ ” Mrs. Brown yells shrilly.   
  
In the back of the class, the large bookcase begins to rattle.   
  
“I’m not!” Daniel shouts back. “You want to know my fucking dream? How about getting back my brother?”   
  
As soon as the words leave him,  
Daniel shrinks in on himself,   
like he’s opened a wound that had barely even begun to heal and it’s hurting.   
It’s hurting bad.  
  
Mrs. Brown points at the door. “Out of my class. _Now_.”   
  
It takes a second for Daniel to move.  
But then he does.  
He storms out of the room, slamming the door shut without so much as touching it.   
  
Chris’s heart pounds in his chest as he stares after his friend.  
  
x  
  
 _eight years (and fifteen minutes after school) ago  
  
_ Chris is almost done with his drawing of a giant taking a nap on the freeway when the classroom door opens. Daniel and Mrs. Brown walk outside. Daniel’s looking at the ground, his arms crossed over his chest like he’s trying to hold himself together.   
  
Chris jumps to his feet.  
  
“Chris,” Mrs. Brown says in surprise. “What are you still doing here?”   
  
“I was waiting for Daniel, Miss.”   
  
Daniel doesn’t meet Chris’s gaze but he stops beside him. Their shoulders brush and Chris feels the overwhelming urge to wrap his arm around Daniel.   
He doesn’t.  
  
“That’s nice, Chris,” Mrs. Brown says. “But I’m sure your father is waiting for you. You’d best hurry along.”   
  
It’s been a long time since his father picked him up from school.  
He usually walks or gets a ride from Claire.  
But Chris doesn’t say that, because he’s not a snitch.  
  
“See you tomorrow, Mrs. Brown,” Chris says, and turns to walk away.   
  
“Oh, and Daniel,” Mrs. Brown calls out, stopping them both. “Remember what I told you.”   
  
Daniel doesn’t say anything.   
Not even when they’re outside, where the low autumn sun shines in their eyes and nearly blinds them.   
Not even when Chris grabs Daniel’s hand and doesn’t let go until they’re standing in front of the Reynolds’ house.  
  
Chris shuffles his feet. He doesn’t want to let go of Daniel’s hand.  
  
“You can always hide out in my treehouse, if you want,” he offers.  
  
Daniel looks at him. “Thanks.”  
  
“I could probably bring you some snacks. Or, uh, maybe even bring you some microwaved mac ‘n cheese, if you’re still hungry.”  
  
“I’ve survived on less,” Daniel says.  
  
And there it is again,  
that reminder that Daniel’s life has been so wildly different up until now.   
That reminder that there are no invisible giants in Daniel’s mind.  
Only an invisible brother.  
  
Chris looks into Daniel’s dark eyes, and finds Daniel looking back at him.  
  
“Next time Mrs. Brown asks,” Chris says, “you should say you also want to be a superhero.”   
  
“But I don’t know if I can still be one.” Daniel looks away. “Not after what I’ve done.”   
  
Chris doesn’t know exactly what Daniel means.  
It can’t be something bad like stealing or... murder, right?  
  
 _What if it is?_ a small voice in his mind asks. _Would you mind?_  
  
“Do you want to be a superhero?” Chris asks.  
  
“Yeah… Yeah, I’d like that.”   
  
A villain like Noctarious would never say that he’d like to be a superhero.  
Never.  
  
“Okay,” Chris says, determined. “Then you can be one. I mean, if you still want to be a team with Captain Spirit…”   
  
Daniel looks up in surprise. His eyes are shining, like he’s going to cry. But he doesn’t. He smiles at Chris and something inside Chris feels warm and fuzzy.   
  
“Awesome! Thanks, Captain Spirit.”   
  
“No problem, Superwolf.”   
  
x  
 _  
 ~~twelve days (less than two but not yet one week) until The Truck of Destruction~~  
_ _a Sean Day._ _  
  
_It’s pouring,  
the day Daniel goes to visit his brother.   
  
Even if Chris doesn’t put the date in his calendar app, he would still know when it was coming. Daniel would get quiet at random moments. He’d be so lost in thought, Chris wasn’t sure even a map would get him out of his head.   
  
And then he’d start texting stuff like:  
  
[Daniel]  
do you think i should tell sean i failed that math test??  
  
[Daniel]  
am i a bad human for not crying during the notebook  
  
(Chris had said that yes, he was, even though he didn’t mean that. It was just that Chris had bawled his eyes out when they watched it.)  
  
[Daniel]  
do you think i shuld practice my powers more? or less?? do you think i should not tlak about my powers at all??  
  
So yes, Chris can always guess when a Sean Day is close.   
  
He watches Daniel run back and forth to the car parked in front of the Reynolds’ house, undoubtedly packing way too much.   
He isn’t even allowed to bring most of it into the prison.   
But he brings it anyway.  
  
Chris smiles.  
  
Maybe he should feel bad that a Sean Day was scheduled in the small amount of time he has left with Daniel. After all, a Sean Day is in actuality a 2-day trip. But Chris doesn’t mind. He never minds.  
  
How could he mind something that makes Daniel so happy?  
  
“Morning, kid,” his dad says behind him, sounding asleep. Then. “Ah. Is it a Sean Day?”   
  
“Yep,” Chris says, watching Daniel say goodbye to Claire and Stephen.   
  
The coffee machine whirrs to life. The sound is harsh in the early morning.  
  
“You want coffee?” his dad asks.  
  
“Yeah, thanks.”  
  
His dad grunts in affirmation, and Chris can hear the cupboards opening and closing. He watches Daniel, dressed in brown shorts and a red shirt, and looking more awake than he normally does this early, get into his car.   
  
It will feel like this, Chris thinks, as the car starts.   
In less than two weeks, it will feel like this.  
  
But Daniel’s car doesn’t go far.  
  
Chris watches in surprise as Daniel parks the car in front of their house and gets out again. Because of the pouring rain, he starts running. Running towards— _What’s he doing?  
  
_ _Ding-dong_ says the Eriksen’s doorbell.  
  
“Who’s that?” his dad asks.   
  
Instead of answering, Chris runs towards the door and all but wrenches it open.   
  
“Hi,” says Daniel, slightly drenched and super casually. “How are you?”   
  
“Uh, I’m fine? How are… you?”   
  
“I’m great. I’m going to see Sean today.” Daniel points behind him at his car. When he turns back, his cheeks are slightly red. “So, uh. I was wondering…”   
  
And then Chris remembers. “Oh! You left the newest comic at my place. Right! Wait a sec, I’ll grab it for you.”   
  
It’s a thing Daniel has done since his very first visit: bring the newest Hawt Dawg Man issue with him, for Sean.  
  
Chris finds the thing underneath his bed, where one of them must’ve kicked it on accident during their last sleepover. He grabs it and quickly runs back to the door. He doesn’t want Daniel to be late.  
  
“Here,” Chris says, slightly out of breath. “Have fun.”   
  
Daniel takes the comic. “Thanks, uh, but that wasn’t actually… That’s not why I’m here.”   
  
“You forget something else?”   
  
Daniel’s cheeks are definitely red now. “Uh,” he says awkwardly. “I wanted to ask if you want to go with me.”   
  
Chris is dumbstruck for a second. He stares at Daniel, who drops his gaze, rubs the back of his neck, and shuffles his feet.  
  
“You want me to visit Sean… with you?”   
  
“Never mind,” Daniel mumbles. “You don’t have to go. I know prison isn’t—”  
  
“Yes!” Chris exclaims. His mind is reeling. He’s never been. He figured this was always a day for the wolf brothers, not for superheroes.   
  
Daniel looks up. His mouth spreads into a grin. “Seriously?”   
  
“Yes! Yes, of course I’ll come with you.”   
  
Daniel’s smile makes Chris’s knees go weak. 

The feeling doesn’t go away as he quickly packs a bag, changes into more comfortable clothes, and brushes his teeth like he’s already fifteen minutes late for school.   
  
He knows it means something.  
In all those years, Daniel has never once asked to go with him.   
  
A burst of nerves spreads through Chris’s chest as he gets in the car.   
  
“So,” Daniel says with a grin.   
  
“So,” Chris says nervously.   
  
“You ready for a super awesome road trip?”   
  
“It’s only five hours away.”   
  
“God, I know,” Daniel says seriously. “I’m so glad they allowed his transfer. Otherwise Claire would’ve never let me go alone.”   
  
Chris remembers the day Daniel heard Sean was allowed to transfer to a prison closer to Beaver Creek. They’d eaten pizza and ice cream and stayed up until three. Stephen had even bought them two beers to celebrate. It had been a good night.  
  
“Anyway,” Daniel says, as they drive through Beaver Creek. “Stephen gave me a little extra for the hotel, so we can order room service. Or buy alcohol.”   
  
As long as it’s not beer.   
Chris doesn’t like beer.   
What he does like, however, is a tipsy Daniel, because a tipsy Daniel is clingy.   
  
Cheeks heating up, Chris instantly feels bad for thinking it. This trip isn’t about his relationship with Daniel. It’s about Daniel and his brother.   
  
_Why not both?_ a small voice in the back of his mind asks. _You’re here, aren’t you?  
  
_ A pop song comes on the radio.   
Daniel hums along as he shakes his shoulders and bops his head. Watching him, Chris feels more in love than ever.   
  
Daniel looks at him and smiles. “Wow,” he says. “You’re really here.”   
  
“Yeah? Unless you changed your mind. That would be alright. I can call my dad, I’m sure he’ll pick me up.”   
  
“Don’t be weird. Of course I want you here.”   
  
And then Daniel reaches over and grabs Chris’s hand. 

Just like that.   
He’s not even looking at Chris, he’s just watching the road. Which is absolutely what he should do, he _should_ watch the road, that’s not what’s bothering Chris.  
  
Chris looks at their clasped hands, lying on his leg.  
  
They’d done this before,  
way, way back when Daniel had been feeling lost and Chris had wanted him to feel like he wasn’t alone.  
They’d held hands during a few dark nights when either of them had nightmares.   
Bad ones.  
They’d held hands when a slow song started at their senior prom and Daniel shrugged before grasping Chris’s hand and pulling him close.  
They’d held hands a few days ago,   
in their treehouse.  
  
Still.   
Chris’s heart races as he grabs Daniel’s hand in return.   
  
x  
  
 _a Sean day, five hours later_.  
  
The prison looks bleak.  
It’s a bare building; the only decoration the barbed wire and bars.   
  
Chris wonders how an artist is supposed to find inspiration in a place like this.   
  
“Come on!” Daniel says excitedly, unbuckling his seatbelt and throwing himself out of the car.   
  
They could’ve checked into their hotel first, but after seeing the disappointment on Daniel’s face at the suggestion, Chris said it was probably better to go see Sean as quickly as possible.  
Daniel’s answering smile was super cute.  
  
While Chris gets out the car, Daniel grabs their backpacks from the trunk, then seems to change his mind.   
  
“Uh. Do you have something sharp in here? Something metal?”   
  
“It’s fine, I’ll only bring my sketchbook,” Chris says.   
  
“ _Ooh_ , good idea! Maybe Sean can give you some tips.”   
  
“That would be awesome,” Chris smiles, even though he’s taking his sketchbook in case Daniel wants some time alone with his brother and he needs to entertain himself.  
  
They walk towards the big, bleak building,   
and Chris can’t help but look up,  
like he’s seeing the sky for the last time.  
  
It’s blue.   
The sky is blue and the air is warm.   
No more rain.  
  
And then they’re inside. It’s colder inside, the aircon no doubt, but there’s something else that sends a shiver down Chris’s spine.  
  
There’s two metal detectors, accompanied by a stern-looking guard. The gates look like portals into another world.  
A bleaker world than the one they just left behind, Chris thinks.  
  
Daniel knows what to do. He immediately puts his backpack on a tray, just like at the airport, then empties his pockets. Chris follows his lead, and together they make it through security without any difficulty. The stern-looking guard tells them in a stern voice that they can get badges at the reception, but Daniel is already nodding.   
  
After eight years, he probably knows the drill.   
  
They don’t talk as they get their badges.   
Well, the man behind the reception talks to them. He asks them a few questions, checks their ID, then whips up two grey badges.   
  
Chris doesn’t know how to act. Or to feel. But when he looks at Daniel and sees him bouncing on his feet as they make their way to the visitation room, he can’t help but feel happy.   
  
The room looks a little like a cafeteria, only smaller. There’s a bunch of tables with plastic chairs surrounding them; most of which are empty.  
  
Perhaps now isn’t a popular time to visit?  
  
“Let’s go!” Daniel exclaims, and drags Chris to a table near the window. “We always sit here.”   
  
Chris pauses, staring at the table in front of him.   
  
Where’s he supposed to sit?  
  
They talked about normal etiquette for visiting; things like hugging or touching and what kind of stuff you’re allowed to bring in.   
They didn’t talk about where Chris would sit.   
  
“Uh,” Chris says, nervously eyeing the guard near the door. “Where do you want me to sit?”   
  
Daniel looks up at him. “Beside me?”   
  
“Yeah? I mean, don’t you want to sit next to Sean?”   
  
“No, that’s alright. I want to look at him.”   
  
“Okay,” Chris says, and sits next to Daniel.   
  
The plastic chair creaks, and it does little to calm Chris’s nerves.   
He has no idea why he’s nervous.   
They’re just going to see Sean.   
Sean, who has only ever been nice to him. Sean, who knew who the superheroes and the bad guys where. Sean, who had talked to Chris about his father in a way that didn’t make Chris feel like shit.  
  
From the corner of his eye, Chris sees Daniel’s leg bounce up and down impatiently.  
  
He’s so excited.   
  
It’s not Sean, Chris realizes.  
It’s Daniel.  
 _That’s why I’m nervous._   
_I don’t want to let Daniel down_.   
  
A woman enters the visitation room. She chooses a table somewhere behind them. And then, finally, the doors in front of them open, and two men walk into the room.  
  
It takes Chris a second to recognize Sean.  
  
His hair is shorter than it used to be, and there’s heavy stubble on his chin. Not quite a beard, but close enough.   
He’s also wearing an eyepatch.   
  
“ _Sean_!” Daniel exclaims, jumping to his feet. His chair flies away, and Chris worries the guards are going to notice.   
  
Sean jogs up to them and envelops Daniel in a big hug. There’s tears in his eyes—eye, and his hands grab onto Daniel’s red shirt like it’s a lifeline. Like he’s a pirate with a sunken ship, and Daniel is the rope pulling him back to shore.  
  
After a minute, the guard calls out, “Okay, that’s enough love.”   
  
With a sigh, Sean pulls back,  
though Daniel is making it difficult, his hands still fisted in Sean’s clothes.   
  
“ _Enano_ ,” Sean says softly. He glances at Chris. “Let’s not be rude to Chris, who you dragged _all the way_ over here.”   
  
“Oh, no, it’s okay,” Chris say quickly.   
  
Reluctantly, Daniel lets go of Sean and turns back to the table. There’s tears on his cheeks and in his eyes, and Chris’s heart clenches painfully.   
  
“So,” Sean says. He sits down opposite Daniel, but his eye is on Chris. “You’ve changed, dude.”   
  
“Yeah, I guess it’s been a while,” Chris says awkwardly.   
  
“Fair enough. Guess I changed too.”   
  
“Do you still draw?”   
  
The question is out of Chris’s mouth before he can stop himself.   
He instantly feels bad. He shouldn’t hog the conversation and take away what precious little time Daniel and Sean have together.  
But Daniel doesn’t seem to mind. If anything, he answers before Sean even can.  
  
“Yeah, he does! You’ve seen a few, right? Sean sometimes sends them to me in a letter.”   
  
“Yeah,” Sean smiles. “I’m allowed to have a sketchbook and a pen.”  
  
“So you draw every day?” Chris asks, curious.  
  
“Almost every day. The world isn’t as shit when you can draw whatever you want in it.”   
  
“What do you mean?”   
  
“I mean…” Sean looks around. “I could draw this visitation room, but instead of shitty, plastic chairs, I’d draw couches and TVs.”   
  
“And a PlayBox!” Daniel chimes in.  
  
“Yeah, exactly.”   
  
“Cool,” Chris says. “I haven’t tried something like that yet.”   
  
“Chris has a lot of still life assignments,” Daniel explains. “They’re boring.”   
  
Sean raises an eyebrow. “I thought you liked being his model.”  
  
Daniel’s cheeks turn red. “Uh, yeah, but… Shut up!”  
  
The visitation room isn’t very noisy to begin with, so when Sean laughs,   
it’s the loudest sound in the entire room.   
  
Chris feels awkward.  
He sneaks a peak at Daniel, but even though his best friend still has red cheeks, Daniel is looking at Sean like he’s water in the desert.   
  
After that, they talk about random stuff.  
  
The conversation is fun and light-hearted, and Chris starts to feel more comfortable. He leans back in the uncomfortable plastic chair and listens to Sean and Daniel talk about college; about what Daniel should and shouldn’t do.   
  
“Hey, I know who I should avoid,” Daniel complains. “You don’t need to tell me.”   
  
“Just looking out for you, little cub. But yeah, you’re right. You’re all grown-up now.” There’s an edge to Sean’s voice. He clears his throat. “But you’d better study hard and keep your room clean. And wash your clothes regularly. Claire isn’t going to be there to clean up your mess.”   
  
“Yeah, yeah.”   
  
“Okay, enough about the future,” Sean says. “Let’s talk about the past. How was your last prom?”   
  
At first, the question seems to be directed at Daniel, but then Sean glances at Chris.   
Chris wonders if Sean knows they went to their senior prom together.  
  
“It was _so_ much fun,” Daniel says enthusiastically. “Ethan managed to spike the punch and so much people got drunk that the teachers noticed and they started this witch hunt, which was basically asking people to breathe in their faces.”   
  
Chris laughs. “Mr. Murphy kept breaking up couples that were slow-dancing and demanding them to breathe in his face.”   
  
“They couldn’t find who did it, though. And because everyone had already drunk from the spiked punch, they decided to just haul the bowl away instead of send everyone outside.”   
  
“Sounds like a perfect prom,” Sean says.   
  
Daniel smiles. “It was.”   
  
It’s a softer smile than usual. It’s a smile that makes Chris want to stare, and it takes him a while to notice that he is.  
When he looks away, he catches Sean’s eye.   
Sean, who noticed Chris staring at his little brother.  
Sean, who doesn’t say anything but gives Chris a secret smile.  
  
 _Oh crap,_ Chris thinks. _He definitely knows_.  
  
Sean leans back in his chair. “So,” he says slowly. “Anything else happen, _enano_?”   
  
Daniel tenses. “Uh, nothing much."  
  
“Yeah?” Sean asks. He’s smiling now.  
  
Daniel shifts nervously in his seat. “It was just a fun night. Nothing, uh, nothing happened.”   
  
Chris wonders for a second what was supposed to happen.   
Then it hits him.  
Sean’s wondering if Daniel made a move on a girl.  
  
But Chris was there, and Daniel barely even talked to a girl aside from his ex, Sophie, but she had her arm around Jonathan Lee, captain of the soccer team, and it didn’t look like she intended to let go anytime soon.  
  
“Nothing happened,” Chris says, defending his best friend. “Daniel didn’t even dance with any girls.”   
  
“Somehow that doesn’t surprise me,” Sean says, still smiling.  
  
The comment surprises Chris.  
  
It’s not like Daniel doesn’t have any ‘game’. He could easily get a girlfriend if he wanted. Michelle from a year below had been head over heels for Daniel. Chris would see her at all of Daniel’s games, and she always brought a hand-made poster with her. A poster that said: _Daniel ur the best xxx_.  
  
“Tons of girls wanted to dance with Daniel,” Chris blurts out. “He was just being nice by keeping me company.”   
  
“Uh," Daniel starts, shifting in his seat. "I wouldn’t say—”  
  
“Wait, I thought _you_ were his date,” Sean says.  
  
At the word _date_ , Chris turns red.   
  
“He was—” Daniel begins.   
  
“It was just for fun," Chris objects.  
  
They both fall silent.  
  
Chris wonders what Daniel was going to say.   
  
_He was not my date,  
_ _it was a last-minute decision,  
_ _he was my safe option.  
  
_ Sean is looking at them with an expression that borders on exasperation.   
  
Beside Chris, Daniel fidgets in his chair.   
  
No one says a word.   
  
Eventually, Sean throws up his hands. “Alright, _enano_. It’s your life. You pick the pace.”   
  
_What does that mean?_  
  
“I know,” Daniel mumbles.   
  
Chris looks from his best friend to his best friend’s brother. The silence between them feels a little tense.  
  
“Are you guys fighting?” he asks in a small voice. “I’m sorry if I said something wrong.”   
  
To his relief, both Daniel and Sean immediately shake their heads and start reassuring him.  
  
Daniel says, "No, no, Sean is right. I'm not mad at him."  
  
Sean says, "I'm not mad at Daniel, Chris. I just think he needs a little push."  
  
Daniel says, "Sean was just teasing me."  
  
Sean says, "Daniel was just embarrassed."  
  
Daniel says, "I love Sean. He's my big brother. I could never be mad at him. Sometimes I just… sometimes I just miss him…"  
  
Sean says, "Hey, _enano_ , don't cry."  
  
But that doesn't stop Daniel's tears.  
  
It's not even the worst part, watching Daniel break down.   
It's seeing Sean move to his feet and having a guard bark at him to stay put.   
It's seeing the hurt and anger and frustration on Sean's face as he grabs Daniel's hands so tightly his fingers turn white.  
  
x  
  
 _a Sean day, five minutes later_.  
  
“If I had a superpower,” Chris says—the first thing he says after leaving the visitation room, the first thing he says when they're outside. “I would make sure you could see Sean whenever you wanted.”   
  
Daniel turns to him in surprise.

The sky above is a baby blue, and the warm wind ruffles Daniel’s dark hair.  
  
Chris feels like crying.  
  
“I would make sure Sean never goes to prison.”   
  
The surprise on Daniel’s face melts into a soft smile.   
He takes a step closer, and it’s then that the tears really start falling down Chris’s face.  
  
“It’s just so unfair,” he sniffs.  
  
“Chris…”   
  
“He’s your brother, your family.” Chris rubs his eyes. “You should be with him whenever you want.”   
  
Daniel wraps his arms around him. It’s not a tight hug, but it doesn’t need to be. The way Daniel leans his head on Chris’s shoulder and pulls him close says enough.   
  
After a while,   
after they’ve both stopped crying,   
Daniel leans back and gives Chris a weak smile. “I think I’ve had my share of emotions for today. Let’s see if we can get drunk.”  
 _  
_x  
  
 _three years ago  
  
_ They’re in Ethan’s basement, surrounded by balloons and garlands. There’s confetti on the floor and underneath Chris’s socks, and he hopes he won’t find confetti in his everything for the next month.   
  
The radio is on. Pop music drifts quietly between their energetic conversations—everyone is a little hyper from the coke and the birthday cake they ate half an hour ago.  
  
Beside Chris, Daniel is talking and laughing with Jonathan and Callum, who are also on the soccer team.   
  
“You know what we should do,” Ethan says, and everyone falls silent because it’s Ethan’s birthday. “We should get booze.”   
  
Callum snorts. When Ethan shoots him a look, his eyebrows shoot up. “What? You serious?”   
  
“Hell yeah,” Ethan says. “I’m 16 now. I think I’m allowed a beer.”  
  
“Not legally,” Chris mumbles, but everyone hears him anyway.  
  
“Fuck that. Fuck the law.” Ethan shoots Daniel a look. “I bet Daniel's already drunk beer.”  
  
Daniel frowns.   
Whether it’s because Ethan brought up his time on the run or because he singles him out amidst friends, Chris doesn’t know.   
  
“Only a sip,” Daniel says. “My brother wouldn’t let me drink.”   
  
“Well, I don’t see him here, so let’s do it. I’ll go ask my brother to buy us some.”  
  
The rest of the boys move to their feet, but Daniel is almost frozen on the spot. Aside from his hands, which are balled into fists and shaking slightly.   
  
“Daniel?” Chris asks quietly.   
  
“I’m fine,” Daniel says through clenched teeth.   
  
“Sure? I could punch Ethan for you, if you want.”   
  
It earns him a laugh, and Chris is relieved to see Daniel relax a little.   
  
“No thanks, Captain Spirit. It’s Ethan’s birthday.”   
  
“Yeah, but I don’t know why we’re even here. We’re not really friends with him.”   
  
“Neither are Jonathan or Callum.” Daniel leans in closer, and his new deodorant fills Chris’s nose. It’s a darker scent than Daniel normally wears and it’s making Chris feel light-headed. In a good way. “I don’t think Ethan has any friends, actually.”   
  
“That’s kinda sad,” Chris says, unable to stop himself from staring at Daniel.  
  
“Yeah. Guess we should just go along with him, so he has a nice birthday.”  
  
Chris nods, and Daniel gives him a smile in response that makes Chris’s heart skip a beat.   
Unfortunately, Ethan and the rest come back down the stairs then, and Daniel leans back.   
  
It doesn’t take Ethan’s brother long to buy them beer.   
  
When he dumps the six pack on the coffee table, everyone leans in and stares at it like it’s some kind of magic potion. Shaking his head, Ethan’s brother leaves with a sarcastic, “Don’t get _too_ drunk, kids.”   
  
The room falls silent.  
Chris wonders if he should reach for a beer. But it’s Ethan’s birthday. Shouldn’t he be the first to take one?  
  
“Okay,” Daniel says, breaking the silence. He grabs a can. “Cheers to you, Ethan.”  
  
And then, in front of eight pair of surprised eyes, he cracks open the beer and takes a long sip, his adam’s apple moving in time with his gulps. With a sigh, he puts the beer down on the table and wipes his mouth.   
  
It’s one of the sexiest things Chris has ever seen.   
He shifts uncomfortably on the floor.   
  
“Alright then,” Ethan says, and also reaches for a beer. The way he cracks it open doesn’t look nearly as smooth as how Daniel did it, but he covers it up by drinking longer—until he’s red in the face. Then he lets out a big burp that is seriously nasty.   
  
“Cheers to me,” Ethan burps.  
  
Jonathan and Callum laugh, and also reach for a beer.   
It means Chris can no longer pretend he’s not sure about this.   
  
Chris quickly grabs a can and opens it smoothly. He’s seen his father do it enough times to know how.   
His stomach turns as soon as the smell of beer hits his nose.   
It smells like insults and shouting and bruises.  
  
“What’s the matter?” Ethan laughs. “You’re not scared of alcohol, are you?”  
  
“I don’t know about this,” Chris says.   
  
“You don’t have to drink,” Daniel says.  
  
“Pff, yeah, he does,” Ethan says, taking another drink. “He didn’t even try it. It’s just beer, Chris. Don’t be so gay.”   
  
Chris’s heart stops, and he nearly drops his beer.  
  
 _Don’t be so gay_.  
  
He shoots Ethan a panicked look, because does he know? Does he know about Chris’s dreams and thoughts and all the times he started daydreaming in the bleachers during one of Daniel’s soccer games?  
  
“Shut the fuck up,” Daniel says. He sounds angry, but Chris is too scared to look at Daniel to check.   
  
“What?” Ethan says with a shrug.   
  
“There’s nothing wrong with being gay, don’t be fucking dumb.”   
  
Ethan opens his mouth to argue, but Chris doesn’t want them arguing about this, so he holds his breath and takes three big gulps.   
  
It’s nasty.  
  
But it ends the argument between Ethan and Daniel, even though Daniel’s frowning when Chris looks at him.   
  
“What?” Chris asks.  
  
“You don’t have to drink if you don’t want to,” Daniel repeats.  
  
 _Don’t be so gay_.  
  
Chris shrugs and takes another drink. “It’s just beer. It’s fine.”  
  
It’s not.  
Chris feels his eyes start to water, and his stomach protests violently against the revolting aftertaste in his mouth.   
But he forces himself to smile.  
  
Daniel doesn’t return his smile.   
  
x  
  
 _a Sean day, four hours later_.  
  
As Chris leaves the shower, wafts of steam follow him into the room. He forgot to take a shirt with him so he dashes towards his bag, hoping Daniel isn’t back from his trip to the supermarket.  
  
“Had a nice shower?”   
  
Startled, Chris nearly drops his bag. He whirls around to find Daniel lounging on one of the beds, a plastic cup filled with what looks like wine in his hand.   
  
“Uh, yeah,” Chris says. “It was a nice shower.”   
  
He feels a drop of cold water fall from his hair on his shoulder and down his chest. Goosebumps break out over his skin.   
  
Daniel’s eyes flicker to his chest.  
  
“Uh,” Chris says. “So you got us some booze?”   
  
Another drop of water hits Chris's chest. Shivering, he brushes it away. Daniel's eyes follow his hand. There's a faint blush on Daniel's cheeks; the wine, probably.  
  
“What did you buy?” Chris asks awkwardly.   
  
Daniel’s eyes snap up.   
They look darker than usual. It’s probably the lights in the room, they’re dimmer than what Chris is used to.   
  
“Wine,” Daniel says finally. He sits up. “Bought a sweet one.”   
  
Sweet white wine is Chris’s favorite.  
It’s not Daniel’s, but he buys it because he knows that Chris can’t stand beer.   
Even though he’s shirtless, Chris’s chest feels warm.  
  
“Pour me one,” Chris smiles, and then turns his back on Daniel to put on his shirt.   
  
When he turns around again, Daniel still hasn’t moved.   
Chris would blame it on the wine and the exhausting day, but Daniel actually jolts when he turns around.   
Like he’s been caught.  
  
“Uh, okay. Wine,” Daniel says, but he sounds distracted.  
  
 _Maybe he’s still thinking about Sean._ _  
  
_Chris jumps on the bed next to Daniel and takes the generously filled plastic cup offered to him.  
  
Instead of talking, Daniel reaches for the remote and turns on the TV. Almost simultaneously, they settle back against the headboard and watch the comedy that’s on.   
  
Their bare legs brush against lightly each other.  
Every time it happens little pleasant sparks shoot through Chris.  
  
Until half-way through the movie, when Daniel simply lets his leg rest against Chris.  
  
From then on, it’s very hard to concentrate on the movie.   
  
Chris finds himself looking down at their legs frequently.   
Daniel’s thighs are strong, from all the soccer games, and covered in dark hair. Chris kinda really badly wants to touch Daniel’s thighs. Maybe squeeze them, feel the muscle—  
  
“You want a refill?” Daniel asks.  
  
Chris almost jerks his leg away in surprise. He manages to smother the reflex enough, but his leg still spasms slightly.  
  
“Yeah, sure,” he says.  
  
As soon as his cup is full, he takes a _big_ drink. His throat burns, but it’s better than being too focused on his straight best friend’s thighs.   
  
They settle back to watch the movie, which is kinda funny but not very good.   
It’s not nearly interesting enough to distract Chris from Daniel, especially not when Daniel’s head falls on his shoulder.   
  
Chris peeks at Daniel from the corner of his eye.  
  
Should he say something?  
  
“If you’re too tired, we can stop the movie,” he says gently.   
  
Daniel shakes his head and Chris feels his hair brush against his neck. “No, I want to know if they get back together.”   
  
“Okay.”   
  
It’s simultaneously very, _very_ okay,  
and very _not_ okay.  
  
There’s something different about the way Daniel leans against him. Maybe it’s because their bare legs are touching, or maybe it’s the wine, or maybe it’s the heat of Daniel’s skin against Chris’s.   
Maybe it’s the way Daniel has subtlety plastered himself against him.   
  
Or maybe it’s just everything.  
  
“Chris?”  
  
Chris breathes in sharply. “Yeah?”  
  
“Thanks,” Daniel says sleepily. “For coming with me today. Meant a lot.”   
  
The stress of the situation fades away, and Chris finds himself smiling.  
  
“No problem. You know I’d do anything for you, superwolf.”  
  
He hears more than sees Daniel smiling; a soft, amused sigh that makes him want to wrap his arms around Daniel and never let go.  
  
x

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next time; It’s just after dinner—another microwave meal that tastes like plastic—when the screaming starts. 
> 
> If that isn't an ominous preview, haha. Anyway! I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) I know that technically you're not allowed to bring a backpack with you to prison, but I took some liberty because I thought it was cute that Daniel brought some stuff with him. Forgive me for the inaccuracies! 
> 
> Anyway, let me know what you thought if you want! And thank you for reading ♡


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovely people!
> 
> Happy Valentine's Day! I'm sorry, I'm probably the fortieth online message to say that to you,, Okay, well, how about this: happy Friday! It's the weekend ♡ Why not do some self-care tonight? 
> 
> And enjoy reading!

_eight years ago  
  
_ It’s just after dinner—another microwave meal that tastes like plastic—when the screaming starts.   
  
Chris bolts out of his chair and towards the window, but he can’t see anyone. Did it come from the back of their house?  
  
“What the hell’s going on?” his father grunts, annoyed.  
  
“I don’t know,” Chris says, already pulling on his rubber boots before wrenching the front door open. He runs around the house towards the screaming.   
  
Does someone need help?  
  
The broken, anguished sound comes from the right, and Chris’s heart lodges itself in his throat. That’s where Claire and Stephen live.   
Are they okay?   
They’re old, what if they…  
  
But it’s not Claire or Stephen.   
  
It’s a boy in a red t-shirt, hunched over, his hands balled in fists as he's screaming at the top of his lungs at the night sky.   
It’s Daniel.  
  
After months of not hearing from him, he’s suddenly back in Claire and Stephen’s backyard.  
Like he never left.  
  
“Daniel?” Chris shouts.  
  
All around Daniel, leaves and twigs and rocks fly through the air like a tornado hit Beaver Creek.  
  
Chris takes a hesitant step closer. He can see one of the planks from the fence wiggle dangerously, like it’s going to fly off at any moment. Chris’s arm hasn’t been out of the cast for long. He’s not planning on going back to the hospital so soon.  
  
But then Daniel lets out a scream that breaks off into a choked sob,  
and he falls to his knees,  
and it’s like a giant magnet is pulling on Chris; everything seems to bend towards Daniel.   
  
With a groan, the fence breaks and falls down.  
  
Chris has to help.  
Or else the world is going to collapse.  
  
Chris closes his eyes for a second, gathering his courage, then runs straight towards the center of the tornado. A few rocks hit him, a few twigs scratch him, and he’s sure there’s a leaf or two in his hair and clothes, but he keeps running until he reaches Daniel.  
  
“Daniel!” Chris shouts. “I didn’t know you were back!”   
  
Daniel’s head snaps up. His eyes are red and tears are streaming down his cheeks. “Only I did! I’m the only one who came back!”  
  
Chris’s blood feels cold.   
_Oh, no_.  
  
“I’m so sorry, Daniel.”  
  
“I don’t want our story to end,” Daniel sobs. His hands curl into the earth, ripping up the grass. “I don’t want to be alone. A wolf needs… needs a pack.”  
  
Hesitatingly, Chris sinks to his knees and puts a hand on Daniel’s shoulder.   
He remembers lying in bed at night, every night, crying for his mother. Crying for her to come back, to read him another bedtime story, to not leave him… alone.  
  
Maybe, Chris thinks, as he watches Daniel,  
maybe,  
they both don’t have to be alone anymore.  
  
“You’re not,” he says. “You’re not alone… Superwolf.”  
  
The world goes quiet.  
Everything, twigs and leaves and rocks, falls to the ground.   
The magnetic pull is gone too.  
  
All that’s left are two superheroes  
and their grief.  
  
“I miss Sean.”  
  
Chris doesn’t know what to say.   
He just keeps his hand on Daniel’s shoulder and hopes it’s enough.  
  
After a while, Daniel’s crying stops and he seems to calm down a little. His hands let go of the chunks of grass.  
  
“He’s not dead. But it feels like he is.”  
  
“He’s not?” Chris asks before he can stop himself.  
  
“He’s in prison. For years and years and years.”  
  
“Oh.”  
  
Daniel takes a deep, shuddering breath. Then he looks at Chris. “Did you mean it?”  
  
Chris doesn’t need to ask what.  
  
“Yeah,” he says. “Captain Spirit never lies. And besides… We’re neighbors now, aren’t we? That means we can have awesome sleepovers, like, _all_ the time.”  
  
Daniel manages a weak smile. “That sounds… cool. Yeah, that would be cool.”  
  
x  
  
 _one week until The Truck of Destruction_  
  
[Daniel]  
u up?  
  
[Chris]  
yeah, I was just drawing   
  
[Daniel]  
want to hang out?  
  
[Daniel]  
i was thinking we could go round beaver creek  
  
[Daniel]  
visit our fav spots yknow  
  
It’s a nice idea,   
so why is it suddenly so hard to breathe?  
  
Because it feels like Daniel is saying goodbye to Beaver Creek,  
and the life he had here.  
  
Chris stares at his phone.  
His stomach feels like it’s tangled itself into knots. He doesn’t want to say goodbye to Daniel, not ever.  
  
But that’s real life, isn’t it?  
  
[Chris]  
yeah okay! let me put on shoes  
  
With tears in his eyes, Chris laces up his vans. He feels stupid crying about something he has known was coming for _years_. Daniel always wanted to go to a university somewhere warm. He had confessed it in the dark, underneath Chris’s Power Bear blanket, and Chris had said that would be cool.  
  
But now that the moment’s here, it doesn’t feel cool at all.  
Just sad.  
  
The doorbell rings.  
 _Crap._  
  
Chris runs towards the bathroom and checks his face in the mirror. His eyes are a little water-y, a little red, but it doesn’t look too bad. His hair on the other hand. Daniel was right, it definitely needs a touch-up. The purple looks washed-out and sad.  
  
“Just like me,” Chris mumbles.  
  
The doorbell rings again.  
  
“Yeah, I’m coming!” he yells, but his eyes go back to his reflection. He doesn’t want Daniel to know he’s been crying. Daniel should just focus on being happy.   
Chris pushes the corners of his mouth up with his fingers, but it looks kinda ridiculous.   
  
When he opens the door, Daniel’s smile fades and his eyebrows knit together. “What’s wrong? Have you been crying?”   
  
Of course Daniel knows.  
  
Chris laughs. “I’m okay. Let’s go.”   
  
He steps outside and only then notices the bike standing next to Daniel.   
  
“I was thinking we could ride our bikes to school? For old time’s sake?”  
  
The knot in Chris’s stomach twists further, but Chris makes sure his smile doesn’t falter as he agrees.   
Luckily, when they both get on their bikes and ride the usual way to school, the feeling subsides pretty quickly. Daniel’s talking about a show he’s been watching on Netflix, and it really feels just like a few months before.   
  
Except the school is completely deserted when they arrive.  
  
“Woah, that’s weird,” Daniel says, stepping off his bike. “I’ve never seen it this empty.”  
  
They walk around the building, peering through the windows.   
  
Chris actually feels kinda wistful when they peek into the art classroom. Even though Daniel didn’t take art classes, it’s still a nice memory for them both. Chris usually had art at the end of the day. And after he’d packed up his supplies and washed the paint off his hands, Daniel would be waiting for him by the door, hair still wet from showering after practice, looking like he’d stepped right out of Chris’s dream.  
  
Obviously, Daniel runs towards the sport fields next.  
Chris trails behind him, a smile on his face.  
  
He was totally fine with not being on the school team and instead watch Daniel from the stands. To be honest, Chris had never had any interest in the game before, but watching his best friend play was, uh... interesting.   
Very interesting.  
  
“Oh man, I’m gonna miss this place,” Daniel says, as Chris joins him on the bleachers. “How it felt to play in the team, to feel your muscles ache, and yet you push on and you score…” Daniel grins. “That feeling was amazing. Hearing the crowd go wild, cheering for you.”   
  
“I can imagine,” Chris says, staring at the green field below. “You had some serious fans too. Like a real superhero.”  
  
Daniel is quiet. His leg starts bouncing up and down, usually a sign that he’s nervous.  
  
“No, um. The best feeling was when I scored and I would look at the crowd and... you’d be there. _That_ made me feel like a superhero.”   
  
It’s a warm day,  
that's why Chris’s cheeks are on fire and he feels so warm and sweaty.  
  
“Oh,” is all Chris manages to say, staring at his hands.  
  
“Yeah…” Daniel laughs awkwardly. “Uh, anyway. I’m glad you always came to watch me play. _If_ you came to watch me, and not the other guys.”  
  
Admittedly, the other boys on the soccer team hadn’t been bad to look at. Especially Jonathan had grown some nice muscles in their senior year, and Chris had been staring maybe a little.   
  
Daniel had caught him once.   
He’d quirked an eyebrow in disbelief, mouthing _really?_ like he thought Chris had awful taste. But he’d probably been a little jealous of Jonathan’s muscles,   
because after that, Daniel had starting working out too.  
  
“No way," Chris says. “I was there for you. I had to make sure you weren’t slacking off, and staring at the cheerleaders.”  
  
“Dude, I was never into the cheerleaders!”  
  
“Liar,” Chris laughs. “Every guy in school was into the cheerleaders.”  
  
“You weren’t,” Daniel points out. “You had a thing for Jonathan.”  
  
Chris groans. “Did not. I was just appreciating his, uh, physique.”  
  
“Yeah, right. _Appreciating_. Anyway, it doesn’t matter now. I got bigger muscles than Jonathan anyway.”   
  
Daniel flexes his arm and sure, he’s not as muscular as Jonathan, but there’s some nice definition to his arms.   
Very… nice.   
Chris wants to touch Daniel’s arms _so_ badly.  
  
With a shock, Chris snaps himself out of it. He hopes Daniel didn’t notice he was staring, but when he looks up, Daniel is grinning.   
_Crap_ , he definitely noticed.  
  
“Uh,” Chris says, feeling his face grow warm. He abruptly moves to his feet. “Where do you want to go next?”   
  
“No, wait, Chris,” Daniel says, and grabs Chris’s wrist. “I meant it.”  
  
Chris’s skin tingles where Daniel is touching him.   
  
“It meant a lot to me that you were always at my games,” Daniel continues. “Even when you were super ill, you still dragged yourself out of bed for me.”  
  
“I promised you’d never be alone,” Chris says.  
  
“I know.”   
  
Daniel is looking up at Chris with a soft smile that makes Chris’s knees weak.  
  
He’s afraid it’s going to show on his face,   
everything Daniel makes him feel.   
But if it does, Daniel doesn’t comment on it.   
Instead, he moves to his feet and lets go of Chris’s wrist only to grab his hand.   
  
Chris’s heart skips a beat.  
  
“Let's buy some snacks at the supermarket, then go to the playground,” Daniel says.   
  
“Okay.”  
  
On the way to their bikes, the walk past the gym building.   
  
Chris looks at the spot where he got his first kiss from Mikey Jones. He remembers standing there with his back against the wall, feeling the cold stones underneath his hands and thinking _I don’t like this_.  
He remembers feeling so sad, so alone, so… cheated.  
  
“Chris?”   
  
Chris tears his gaze away from the building. Daniel’s looking at him, the question clear on his face.  
  
“Just reminiscing,” he says.  
  
“Isn’t that where you got your first kiss?”   
  
Chris pulls a face. “Yep.”  
  
Daniel laughs. “Oh dude, I’m so sorry it was so shitty.”  
  
“Nah, it’s fine. Someday I’ll meet someone who’s good at kissing.”  
  
“Sophie said I was a good kisser.”  
  
The words come out of Daniel’s mouth in a rush.   
  
To be fair, Daniel looks just as surprised as Chris,   
but then he straightens his shoulders and meets Chris’s gaze head on, like he’s determined to own them.  
  
“Okay?” Chris says hesitatingly. Why is Daniel boasting about this? “Good for Sophie, I guess.”   
  
“No, I mean—uh…” Daniel falls silent. His face is scrunched up, like he’s thinking really hard about something. It looks cute. “I meant that you deserve to be kissed by someone who knows what they’re doing.”  
  
Chris’s cheeks heat up.   
  
What the hell is Daniel saying?   
  
“And you’re volunteering? That’s sweet, but I’m sure there’s plenty of people at college to show me the ropes.”  
  
Daniel doesn’t say anything.  
The silence that follows is even more awkward than before, which isn’t weird because what the crap?   
  
_Why did I say that?  
  
_ “Uh,” Chris says. “Anyway… Let’s go? We can buy some hair dye too, and I’ll let you do my hair for the party.”  
  
That cheers Daniel up. “Really?”  
  
“Yep.”  
  
Still, the smile on Daniel’s face disappears quickly when he thinks Chris isn’t looking.  
  
But Chris is.  
He almost always is.  
  
x  
  
 _less than a week until The Truck of Destruction,  
_ _or: one day until Samantha Hunt’s going-away party._ _  
  
_They’re in the bathroom with the door open, so they don’t die from breathing in all the chemicals.  
  
Daniel giggles as he puts hair clips into Chris’s hair, sectioning off the parts that _don’t_ need to be purple.   
  
“You’re having too much fun with this,” Chris says. “I’m getting worried.”  
  
“Imagine I fucked up your hair. It would be people’s last impression of you.”  
  
“I’d just shave it all off.”  
  
Daniel’s movements still. He looks shocked at Chris in the mirror. “You wouldn’t.”  
  
Chris grins. “I would.”  
  
With a concentrated look on his face, Daniel continues clipping away Chris’s hair.   
It’s a nice feeling.  
Daniel’s hands are warm as they occasionally brush the tops of Chris’s ears and the back of his neck.   
  
For a second, a fleeting, indulgent second, Chris imagines Daniel cupping the back of his neck and pulling him in for a kiss.  
  
“Okay,” Daniel says. “Time for chemicals.”   
  
“Yep,” Chris says, eyes flying open— _when had he closed them?_   
  
The strong smell of chemicals hits their noses,  
and then the sound of the paint-like brush scraping in the plastic bowl fills the bathroom.   
  
It’s familiar.  
They’ve done this so many times Chris lost count.  
  
The first time, Chris had done it on his own.  
He was maybe too young, but he thought it’d look cool. All those anime heroes had brightly colored hair too, so why couldn’t he?  
  
It had been horrible.  
Obviously.  
  
After that, Daniel volunteered to help.   
He had thought it was cool of Chris to dye his hair, and it did look so much better when it was done correctly.   
  
Chris stares in the mirror at their reflections; at Daniel carefully applying the paint on his bangs, using gloves and everything.   
  
Chris’s heart suddenly fills with so much love that it feels like it’s going to burst.  
  
“I love you,” Chris says, unable to stop himself from smiling.  
  
Daniel looks up in surprise.   
Their eyes meet in the mirror and Daniel’s breath leaves his lungs in a rush;   
a big exhale that’s almost a sigh.  
  
Then he smiles. “I love you too.”  
  
x  
  
 _three days until The Truck of Destruction,  
_ _or: Samantha Hunt’s going-away party._ _  
_ _  
_When Chris opens the door,  
he tries very hard to act casual and not like he spent an _hour_ on his outfit and the smudgy eyeliner that was supposed to look punk.   
  
“Wow,” Daniel says, and it’s like he’s reading Chris’s mind because… _wow_.  
  
Daniel’s wearing jeans and a black button-up shirt, but the sleeves are rolled up, and Chris feels his mouth go dry as he looks at Daniel’s arms—  
  
“Have fun tonight, boys,” Chris’s father cuts through his thoughts. “Don’t wake me up when you get back.”  
  
Daniel shoots Chris’s father a smile. “No worries. We’ll be super quiet!”   
  
“You’d better be. And bring my boy back home safe.”   
  
Chris knows his father is joking; he can hear it in his voice. But Daniel nods seriously and says, “Of course.”  
  
Chris’s father looks up from the TV with raised eyebrows.  
  
“ _Uhh_ ,” Chris says and pushes Daniel out the house. “Bye, dad.”  
  
x  
  
When Samantha Hunt opens the door,  
Chris is hit once again with how astonishingly beautiful she is.  
  
Unlike Chris, she _does_ know how to apply a smokey eyeliner that looks cool.   
She doesn’t look like a raccoon, basically.  
  
Chris wants to find the nearest bathroom and wipe it all off.  
  
But then Samantha Hunt says, “If it isn’t Diaz!”   
  
“Hey, Samantha,” Daniel grins.   
  
“So glad you could make it. Come in, come in. The rest of the team is already here, since they haven’t heard of stylishly late.”  
  
Daniel laughs. “They’re athletes. They’re used to getting up early.”   
  
Chris wonders if they’re flirting.  
He also wonders if they’re going to stay out here, because it’s kind of chilly and he’s wearing his ripped black jeans.  
  
“Remember that one game in Fairplay?” Samantha continues. “Everyone was still half-asleep during warm-ups.”  
  
Oh, yeah. As a cheerleader, Samantha had gone to a lot of the away games too.  
  
“I remember Callum tripping and falling on his ass,” Daniel says. “He looked so surprised.”   
  
“Yeah, Lizzy fucked up a simple somersault, it was so early.”  
  
“Uh,” Chris says. “I’m gonna go inside, I think.”  
  
“Oh, yeah of course!” Samantha says. “Sorry for making you stand there. Let’s go inside. That’s where the party is after all.”  
  
As they follow her into the house, the music grows louder and louder. Chris can almost feel the bass pound through his body.   
  
Crammed into Samantha Hunt’s living room  
is almost everyone from their year.   
  
Chris takes a deep breath, gearing himself up for socializing with people who casually used to bully him. Nothing major, nothing in front of Daniel, just the little things.   
  
“ _Hey, you want the pink one, Chris?”  
  
_ _“Hey Chris, you know about fashion, right?”  
  
_ _“Who do you think is the hottest of us?”  
  
_ Neither, Chris had wanted to say in that particular situation. They had cornered him in the locker room, Thom and Scott, both without shirts. They had been flexing and asking him again and again if he thought they were attractive. If he got a boner from this.  
  
Chris shakes the memory off. He sees Brooke and Paul near the kitchen and walks over.   
  
They had art class together for three years, and in their second year, Brooke came out as bi to them. Just in the middle of a charcoal painting. Paul had put down his pencil and promptly confessed he was asexual. Chris had been stunned. Especially when they both looked at him then, expecting him to confess something too.  
He had.  
 _So I’ve had a crush on my best friend for years… Eh, yeah.  
_ They had been super cool about it.   
  
“Chris!” Brooke smiles as she sees him. “What’s up? How are you enjoying freedom?”  
  
Chris gives them both a hug. “I’m good. I’ve been doing nothing but drawing and gaming, to be honest. How are you?”  
  
“I was fine until we went to this party,” Paul says dryly. “You arrived at just the right time. Everyone’s now drunk enough to try and get laid with someone they’ve literally never talked to in school.”  
  
“Eh, it’s all part of the fun,” Brooke says.  
  
Paul stares as one of the cheerleaders starts making out with one of the band members. He shakes his head. “This is not how I want to remember my peers.”  
  
Brooke and Chris laugh, and then Paul says he needs another drink and he offers to get them something too. When he’s gone, Brooke leans over with a telling glint in her eyes.  
  
“Oh, no,” Chris says.  
  
“So,” Brooke says. “I see you’re pulling out the big guns tonight. Is it finally happening? Is the pining finally done?”  
  
“I dunno, Brooke.” Chris turns and sees Daniel is still talking with Samantha. The only difference that he’s now holding a red cup. “I don’t think I can beat a cheerleader.”  
  
Just then,   
as if sensing Chris’s gaze,  
Daniel looks over to him.   
  
When their eyes meet, Daniel smiles and gives a little goofy wave that makes Chris laugh.  
  
Brooke’s brown eyes soften. “Chris. Honey. I don’t think there’s a lot of competition.”  
  
Chris turns back to her. “I can’t just assume Daniel’s into guys. We never talked about his sexuality, and I don’t want to make him uncomfortable.”  
  
“Who are we making uncomfortable?” Paul asks, returning with the drinks. He hands Chris white wine in a red cup. “Is it me?”  
  
“No,” Brooke says. “We’re discussing Chris’s mutual crush.”  
  
“Oh, yeah. I love that shit. I especially love how it hurts Chris,” Paul says, giving Brooke a look that speaks volumes.  
  
“Paul, come on. It’s been _years_. They’ve got to—”  
  
Their voices fade into the background as Chris stares at his drink. He kinda wants to drink it all in one go. Maybe if he’s buzzed, he won’t feel so sad about Daniel leaving.   
  
“Woah, okay,” Paul says. “That’s a big drink, oh, okay, you’re still going, and… you drank it all.”   
  
With a big sigh, Chris puts down his cup. “I’m not going to be sad tonight.”  
  
“Hell no, you’re not!” Brooke whoops.   
  
“If Daniel wants to kiss Samantha, he should,” Chris says, frowning. “I don’t care.”   
  
“That’s a lie,” Paul says.  
  
“Okay, I care,” Chris amends. “Because I want Daniel to be happy.”  
  
“And we want you to be happy, honey,” Brooke says. “So let’s get drunk and have a good time together!”  
  
“I’ll get us a bottle,” Paul says.   
  
x

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next time; “Oh, watch out,” Paul slurs—apparently he’s already past tipsy. “Mikey Jones is here.”
> 
> uh-oh, what is going to happen at the partyyyy
> 
> Thank you so much for reading again! It means a lot to know that you enjoy what I write ♡ So if you want to leave me a comment, that would be appreciated. But don't feel the need to!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi lovely people!
> 
> Hope you're having a good day and that you're being nice to yourself ♡
> 
> Enjoy reading!

_a year ago  
  
_ Chris’s world is upside down.  
Like, literally.  
  
He’s hanging off his bed, his feet propped up against the wall, and he’s pretending to read a comic because he can’t focus.  
  
Mere inches away,  
sitting on the ground with his back against the bed,  
is Chris’s best friend in the whole world.  
And also, unluckily, Chris’s lifelong crush.  
  
The combination tends to make things hard, especially when you kissed Mikey Jones behind the gym building because you were upset that your best friend and lifelong crush has a girlfriend but it was awful and you really, really want to talk about it but also…  
You haven’t told your best friend that you’re gay yet.  
  
Chris closes the comic he’s not reading. “It’s too quiet here. Don’t you think it’s too quiet here?”  
  
“Uh,” Daniel says absentmindedly, still engrossed in his own comic. “You can put on some music?”   
  
“Yeah, okay.”   
  
Chris walks over to his laptop and scrolls through his songs. It doesn’t really matter what he puts on, as long as it’s _something_ to break the silence. He picks a song at random, and lets out a sigh of relief when it starts playing.   
It drowns out his restless thoughts just enough.  
Yes. Now he can go back to reading his comic and not think about the fact that he had his first kiss, with a _boy_ , and Daniel doesn’t even—  
  
“Oh, this is a good song,” Daniel comments, eyes still glued to his comic.  
  
“I kissed Mikey Jones behind the gym building,” Chris blurts out.  
  
Daniel doesn’t move.  
  
 _Oh, crap_.  
  
Chris barely breathes as he watches Daniel process the information. At first, Daniel merely looks surprised. Then he frowns. Then, he slowly closes his comic and looks up.  
  
Chris feels frozen to the spot.  
  
“Okay,” is all Daniel says.  
  
“That’s it?”  
  
Daniel shrugs. “Was it good?”  
  
“No,” Chris says immediately.   
  
Daniel frowns again. “Oh. Then why’d you kiss him?”  
  
 _Because I was sad.  
  
_ But that’s a bad reason to kiss someone, so instead Chris says, “Because I thought he was kinda cute?”   
  
“You think?”  
  
Chris feels his cheeks heating up. Why isn’t Daniel commenting on him coming out? Did he already know?   
  
“Yeah, uh, he has this cute…” Chris wracks his brain to find _something_ cute about Mikey Jones. “...fringe?”  
 _  
Nope, dude._  
Chris inwardly winces.  
  
“Fringe,” Daniel repeats. His hand reaches up, like he wants to touch his own fringe, but then he drops it again. “Okay.”  
  
Chris deflates. “Yeah.”  
  
“I’m sorry it was shit.”  
  
“It really was.”  
  
“Do you want to tell me why it was shit?”  
  
Yes, but. “You don’t care that I’m gay?”  
  
“No,” Daniel says immediately. “Absolutely not.”  
  
Something feels so, _so_ much lighter inside Chris’s chest  
and he kind of has the urge to cry.  
  
“Really?” he manages to ask, even though his throat feels like someone’s squeezing it shut.  
  
Daniel looks at him, intent and serious, and that’s enough. Enough for Chris to see that Daniel really accepts it.  
  
“Really,” Daniel says again. “You’re my best friend. And I’m glad you told me. That must’ve been scary.”  
  
One or two tears fall down Chris’s eyes, but he quickly wipes them away.   
It’s too late though, Daniel has already seen them.   
  
He moves to his feet and makes his way over to Chris.   
  
“Sorry,” Chris laughs, wiping away more tears. “I don’t know why I’m crying. You’re being super cool about it.”  
  
Daniel hugs him.  
Closing his eyes, Chris wraps his arms tightly around Daniel and hugs him back.   
They stand like that for a while.  
  
“You’re allowed to cry over a shitty kiss,” Daniel says.  
  
Chris laughs and pulls back. “That’s not why.”  
  
Daniel smiles at him. “I know. But seriously, Chris, thank you for telling me.”  
  
The song ends, and another begins.   
It’s a happy song with an upbeat tempo. A little awkwardly, they both move back to the bed and pick up their comics.  
Chris feels even less like reading now, but apparently Daniel feels the same, because he closes his comic two seconds later.  
  
“You know,” he starts, “Sean is bisexual.”  
  
Chris puts away his comic. “Really?”  
  
“Yeah. He kissed Finn at the camp in Humboldt, you know, the weed plantation.”   
  
Daniel starts telling the story.   
Halfway through, they both turn upside down; hanging off the bed with their legs propped up against the wall.   
  
Chis looks at their matching Power Bear socks,  
and feels happy.  
  
x  
  
The bottle of wine is almost empty thanks to Chris and Paul; Brooke prefers to drink beer.   
Chris is nearly at the stage where he’s perfectly tipsy but not yet drunk. Everything has a shimmer, or more like a blur to it. All the imperfections are smoothed out.   
Chris feels _awesome_.  
  
Until someone taps him on the shoulder.   
  
“Oh, watch out,” Paul slurs—apparently he’s already past tipsy. “Mikey Jones is here.”  
  
Chris turns around and finds himself standing nose-to-nose with Mikey Jones, who probably heard Paul’s comment but doesn’t react to it in the slightest. He just smiles at Chris.  
  
“Hey Chris.”   
  
After their first kiss, they hadn’t really… talked.   
  
Mikey had wanted to go on dates, but Chris had politely declined. He said he wasn’t really ready for relationships yet, and Mikey had respected that.   
He even greeted Chris in the hallway whenever he saw him.   
  
Still.  
The memory of their kiss—the cold stones, Mikey’s wet mouth, and the intense feeling of sadness—makes every inch of Chris feel awkward.   
  
“Hey Mikey,” he says, trying to smile.  
  
“What’s up?”  
  
“Nothing much. Just hanging out with friends, you know?”  
  
Mikey looks around. “Yeah? Where’s your right hand?”   
  
He means Daniel.  
Of course, he does.  
But Chris has vowed to have some fun on his own tonight, so he holds up his right hand and says, “Right here.”  
  
Mikey laughs. He looks good when he laughs. “Okay, point taken. So, you kinda sad to see everyone go?”   
  
Chris shrugs. “Yeah, I mean. A little. I’m gonna miss Brooke and Paul.”  
  
“You had art with them, right?”  
  
“Yep.” Chris takes another sip of his drink. “So how are you? Are you also leaving Beaver Creek behind?”   
  
“Nah, I’m going to a community college not far from here. I kinda want to put more time into my music, really try and see if I can do something with that instead.”  
  
“Really? I had no idea you were into music,” Chris says, feeling momentarily ashamed that he didn’t. “What do you play?”  
  
“That’s alright,” Mikey smiles. He really looks good when he smiles. “Yeah, I play drums.”  
  
“Why drums?”   
  
Mikey takes a step closer, and Chris doesn’t really mind.   
He looks cute in his green hoodie, and his smile is nice. And it’s been a while since their kiss, so who knows? He might’ve improved.  
  
“‘Cause I tried guitar and I hated it,” Mikey confesses with a smile. “My fingers aren’t made for all the grips and riffs. So I tried something else and I found I really liked getting to make a kickass rhythm, something that will make people dance.”  
  
“Huh,” Chris says, and he finds he’s smiling without a problem now. “That’s really cool, Mikey.”  
  
Mikey blushes. His hand brushes lightly against Chris’s, and that’s cool too.   
  
“So what about your future? Are you going to be an artist?”  
  
“Wow,” Chris says quietly. He takes a drink and smiles. “That’s exactly what I want to be, how did you know?”  
  
Mikey shrugs. “I saw some of your art pieces hanging in the classroom. They looked sick.”  
  
Again, Mikey’s hand brushes against Chris’s but this time it’s a longer, lingering touch.   
It’s so different from how Daniel holds his hand.  
Daniel just grabs it.  
  
 _That’s because Daniel isn’t flirting with you_ , Chris’s mind whispers.   
  
Chris’s stomach turns unpleasantly.  
He throws back the rest of his wine, sets the cup behind him on the counter and grabs Mikey’s hand.  
  
He barely registers Mikey’s surprised smile before Daniel bumps into him, trying to sling an arm around his shoulder.   
  
“This is our song!” Daniel shouts in his ear. “We should dance!”   
  
Chris turns his head but Daniel’s face is so close that he quickly looks back again. “No one’s dancing, Daniel.”  
  
“Sure they are,” Daniel says, leaning heavily on Chris. His body is so _so_ warm.   
  
“Where, Daniel? I don’t see th— _Daniel!_ ”   
  
Before he can protest, Daniel drags him away from Mikey and towards the living room.   
There _are_ a few people dancing here, though it’s more of a grinding and kissing than actual dancing. Still, that doesn’t seem to stop Daniel from grabbing Chris’s hands and swinging him around like they’re in a ballroom.   
  
There’s something about Daniel’s dancing, something so natural, that Chris finds himself staring wide-eyed as he’s swung around. Maybe it’s the flashing lights that give Daniel’s smile such a hypnotic effect.  
Chris sees him in every color of the rainbow,   
but the shade Daniel looks the best in is, and always has been, _red_.  
  
While Chris usually paints himself in blue,  
red just looks so natural on Daniel.  
  
He looks like a real hero,   
courageous and strong and radiant.   
  
He looks _sexy_.  
  
So when Daniel twirls Chris closer, Chris goes willingly.  
  
His back hits Daniel’s chest kinda hard,   
because that’s how they’re dancing,  
hearts pounding and breaths racing.  
But when Chris makes to spin away again, Daniel tightens his hold and keeps him close. His breath tickles Chris’s ear as he says, “Stay.”   
  
Speechless, Chris nods.  
  
He can’t believe what’s happening, yet his body seems to know what to do as Daniel starts swaying them in time with the music.   
It’s a slower, Spanish song, but the beat is just as low and grinding as the previous one. It’s pretty popular, been in the charts all summer.   
  
Daniel sings along, his breath hot on Chris’s ear, and Chris feels his entire body flush.   
He’s unstable,   
all feelings and fragmented thoughts,  
and his knees feel weak.  
  
He feels drunk.   
  
It’s why he moves just a bit too slow and suddenly they’re not swaying in sync anymore;  
suddenly, Chris is moving in the opposite direction.  
To his horror, his ass grinds against Daniel.  
Daniel’s breath leaves him in an audible rush, and his hands drop to Chris’s hips, holding on tightly.   
  
“Sorry,” Chris says, half-turning. He meets Daniel’s eyes and sees they’re almost entirely black. “Uh.”  
  
Daniel shakes his head. “It’s okay.”   
  
They’ve stopped dancing.  
Around them, horny people continue grinding and making out, and Chris feels acutely aware of Daniel’s hands on his hips.  
  
Their faces are so close.  
Chris can’t help it;   
he looks down at Daniel’s lips.   
  
He watches Daniel swallow, his adam’s apple moving up and down, watches those lips say, “Chris.”  
  
If they kissed now,   
it would be the perfect memory.  
  
Chris could even write it off as him being too drunk to really know what he was doing, or maybe even being too drunk to remember. Daniel would accept that. He’d accept that and they’d move on.  
Daniel would go to San Diego and they’d never talk about this party or their first kiss ever again.  
  
With a start, Chris realizes that isn’t what he wants.  
  
Before he fully knows what he’s doing, he’s moving back, out of Daniel’s arms.  
Daniel’s face is unreadable. If Chris didn’t know better, he’d say he almost looks _hurt_.  
  
“I’m, uh, thirsty,” Chris says, walking backwards. “I’m gonna get something to drink?”   
  
“Chris,” Daniel says. He reaches out, like he wants to hold onto Chris, but it isn’t Chris who’s leaving Beaver Creek behind, isn’t it?   
It isn’t Chris who’s leaving.  
  
Chris quickly turns and flees to the kitchen.   
  
Brooke and Paul are nowhere to be seen, but Mikey Jones is still there. He looks up when Chris walks past. He doesn’t look sad, not exactly, but there’s an almost wistful smile on his face.   
  
“I always wondered why you weren’t ready for a relationship when half the school was,” Mikey says. “Now I know.”  
  
“I’m sorr—” Chris starts, but Mikey shakes his head.   
  
There’s not really anything else to say.  
It would be too cringey to say,  
 _There’s no room in my heart for someone else,  
_ so Chris says nothing.  
  
Mikey nods, like that’s what he expected, then walks away.  
  
Chris watches him leave,  
then grabs the closest bottle of wine and chugs it.  
  
His head hurts, his heart hurts, and his eyes sting with unshed tears.  
He leans on the kitchen counter, accidentally knocking a few red cups to the floor. Luckily, they’re empty.  
  
“ _Fuuuck_ ,” Chris breathes.  
  
x  
  
After that, it doesn’t matter how much wine Chris drinks.   
The party isn’t as fun anymore, not now Chris knows what it feels like to be held by Daniel like that, to grind against him and hear Daniel exhale against his skin.   
  
Paul and Brooke do a great job of distracting him, and it’s alright, but when Daniel suddenly stands in front of him and asks if Chris wants to go, Chris feels relieved.   
He says yes immediately.  
  
It’s dark outside,  
and the air is actually chilly.  
  
“Guess summer’s almost over, huh,” Chris mumbles, staring at his feet as they walk back home.  
  
“Yeah,” Daniel says. “Weird to think that this is the last time we see some of these people.”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
The wind blows,  
just like the party did,  
and Chris shivers.   
  
He rubs his arms, trying to warm himself up. He sees Daniel look at him. There’s a frown on Daniel’s face, and he moves closer, like he wants to do something.   
But he doesn’t.  
  
Chris sighs. “I’m a sad drunk.”  
  
To his surprise, Daniel laughs.   
  
Chris shoots him a disgruntled look, but it only makes Daniel laugh more. He’s stopped walking, laughing so hard he’s clutching his stomach. And, fine, maybe Chris sounded _very_ whiny.  
  
Before he can help it, Chris is laughing too.  
  
“I’m sorry, Chris, but...” Daniel laughs, wiping at his eyes. “But the way you said it.”  
  
“Hey,” Chris says, but he’s still laughing. He pushes against Daniel’s arm. “I have _every_ reason to be sad. You…” _You’re leaving_. “You ruined my chance of getting lucky, dude.”   
  
Daniel stops laughing.  
He actually, physically, flinches.  
  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were—wanted to get with Mikey.”  
  
Chris laughs. He doesn’t get why Daniel is so serious all of a sudden. They were having fun just a moment ago.   
  
“I know I said he was a bad kisser, but who knows? He might be better now!”   
  
Chris laughs again, but Daniel doesn’t join in. He’s watching Chris like he’s a movie with a bad ending; you kinda don’t want to watch, but you do anyway.  
  
“I think he was actually into me, you know? He said he liked my art! And he knew I wanted to be an artist. That’s, like. Wow. He must really pay attention. He might be the only one who actually really liked me, now that I think about it. That’s a little sad, right?”  
  
Chris laughs, but it’s a weird laugh.  
It sounds a little choked,   
and there’s a burning in his eyes that doesn’t feel nice.  
  
“I pay attention,” Daniel says quietly.  
  
“See!” Chris exclaims as he rubs his eyes. “Told you I’m a sad drunk.”  
  
“Chris, I like you.”  
  
Chris’s heart stops for a moment.   
And then it sinks all the way to his shoes.  
  
“Not in the way I want you to,” he says.   
  
And it’s too much,  
too honest,  
it’s the entire, crappy truth and Chris feels so relieved and so scared for finally admitting it that he turns and starts walking.  
  
It’s kinda telling when Daniel doesn’t call after him.  
  
x  
  
 _one day until The Truck of Destruction_  
  
They haven’t talked since the party.  
  
The morning after, Chris’s father wondered why Daniel hadn’t stayed over, but Chris, who had been incredibly hungover, shot that down by snapping he didn’t do _everything_ with Daniel.  
His father got the hint.  
  
Both Paul and Brooke texted him after the party;   
checking if he was alright since he was  
 _hungover af_ (Brooke)  
and  
 _grinding against daniel in front of everyone_ (Paul).  
  
Chris had replied with,  
 _nope_ _but thanks_.  
  
After his hangover had passed, all he could think about was Daniel smiling at him,  
dancing with him,  
breathing out against his neck.  
  
Maybe it was for the best they hadn’t kissed though.  
  
Because he’d confessed and Daniel hadn’t sought him out after.  
That meant something.  
It meant that Daniel didn’t feel the same, and was trying to find a way to break it to Chris without hurting him.  
  
Which hurt.  
  
There’s a knock on Chris’s door.  
  
“Chris? I made grilled cheese. You want one?”  
  
“No,” Chris says.   
  
His dad sighs. “You have to eat, son.”  
  
“I don’t have to do shit.”   
  
The door handle turns but Chris locked his door. His dad isn’t getting in. He’d take one look at Chris’s messy, dark room and drag him out.  
  
“What’s up with you, Chris? I thought you’d be helping Daniel pack his stuff.”  
  
That hurts.  
The reminder.  
  
“If he wants to leave, he can do it by himself!” Chris shouts.  
  
It’s the wrong thing to say,   
because now his dad knows exactly what’s bothering him.  
  
He’ll probably say that Daniel will visit a lot,  
that they can write emails and call and Skype,  
that many friendships survived college.  
  
He doesn’t.  
  
“Your letter from Pomona arrived.”  
  
Chris’s heart stops.  
Then he’s on his feet, running towards the door and fiddling with the lock in his haste to open it.  
  
When he swings open the door, his father is indeed holding a letter in his hand.  
Chris grabs it from him,   
but then he pauses.  
  
“I’m not ready,” he whispers.  
  
His dad puts a hand on his shoulder. “Apparently, it got delivered to the wrong address. _Twice_. Look at all the stamps.”  
  
Chris does.  
There’s red stamps and scribbles all over the front,  
and it looks like it went across half the state before it finally arrived here.  
  
Just like Daniel.  
  
The letter found its way to Chris,  
just like Daniel did.  
  
What’s to say he won’t find his way back again and again and again?  
  
With shaking hands, Chris opens the letter.  
  
x  
  
 _go time_.  
  
When the villain arrives, it arrives with great flashing lights and a thunderous roar. 

Which is perfect.   
It provides the perfect cover for Captain Spirit to sneak closer without being spotted. He sneaks towards his secret hideout, because even though Captain Spirit has been awake all night, on the lookout for evil, he’s still a superhero.   
And superheroes don’t make mistakes when it counts.  
  
The villain, The Truck of Destruction, flexes its arms and the sound is like the slamming of a door.   
It’s impressive, but Captain Spirit isn’t afraid.  
  
Not until he sees civilians walk towards it.  
They seem to be under the Truck’s enchantment, because they willingly start gathering all their possessions and giving it to the villain.  
  
Captain Spirit clenches his fists.  
  
He has to stop the Truck of Destruction before it takes away everything.   
  
Captain Spirit moves to his feet,  
but then he sees Superwolf walking towards the villain.  
  
He looks fearless in his black t-shirt,  
but he has to be a little afraid, hasn’t he?  
  
Maybe he needs back-up. Captain Spirit should check, just to be sure.  
It would be really bad and not very heroic if he didn’t check if his superhero friend needed help.  
  
But honestly, it looks like Superwolf is fine on his own.  
He actually takes one of the boxes from the other civilians and helps them carry it to the big, bad Truck of Destruction.  
  
“So that’s it, huh?” Captain Spirit mumbles.  
  
His superhero partner has gone to the dark side.  
  
After so many years of working together, their paths finally go in different directions.  
  
With pain in his heart, Captain Spirit salutes his former superhero friend.  
  
“Sayonara, Superwolf,” he says. “It was fun while it lasted.”  
  
But it seems Captain Spirit underestimated Superwolf’s super-hearing,   
because Superwolf suddenly looks up  
and straight at him.  
  
x  
  
The urge to hide in his tree house is big.  
But it would be a really shitty thing to do after Daniel saw him.  
  
With a sigh, Chris climbs down the tree and walks towards the moving truck parked in front of the Reynolds’ house.  
It’s not as big as Chris thought it would be, but it’s still impossible to ignore, no matter how badly Chris wants to.  
  
He stops in front of Daniel, eyes glued to the truck.   
Maybe it’s easier if he doesn’t look his best friend in the eye.  
  
“Hi,” Daniel says.  
  
“Hi,” Chris says.  
  
 _You’re leaving_ , is what he actually wants to say.  
  
Daniel clears his throat. “What’s up?”   
  
“Nothing much. You?”   
  
_I’m so in love with you and you’re leaving,_ is what Chris should say.  
  
Daniel shrugs. He runs a hand through his hair. It’s gotten longer again. He should probably cut it before he goes, but that’s too bad, isn’t it?   
Because he’s leaving today.  
Today.  
  
“I’m a little tired,” Daniel says. “It was hard to figure out what to take with me.”  
  
 _But it wasn’t hard to decide you wanted to leave me_?  
  
“Oh,” is all Chris says.   
  
The moving truck’s engine is an ominous background noise.   
Like it’s threatening to leave any moment.  
  
Daniel runs a hand through his hair again.   
Chris has thought of doing that too.   
Many times.  
  
Daniel sighs. “Chris. Listen—”  
  
“I got my letter from Pomona,” Chris blurts out, because he’s not ready for a rejection. He’s not.   
  
“What? Really? What did it say? Why was it so late?”   
  
Daniel looks nervous and excited,   
and it feels just like it did before they had their fight.  
Like nothing happened.  
  
Chris gets the letter from his back pocket. It’s crumpled up so he smooths it out a little. He takes a deep breath.  
  
“I got in.”  
  
“No way!” Daniel exclaims, and he’s smiling. “I told you you would!”   
  
Chris smiles too. “You did.”   
  
Before he’s aware of what’s happening, Daniel wraps his arms around him and lifts him off the ground. They swing around on the pavement. Daniel keeps rambling about how proud he is, how he _knew_ Chris would get in because they’d be fools to reject him, and Chris can’t help but laugh.   
  
They feel normal again.  
Because this is what being friends with Daniel is like,  
it’s laughing and feeling weightless and the world is spinning just a little but in a good way.  
  
Daniel sets him down again. He’s still smiling. “Dude, I’m _so_ happy. Now we won’t have to do the whole long distance thing. We’ll live 2 hours away from each other!”  
  
“Yeah,” Chris says.   
  
“Oh, man, I could come over and help you set up your room. We could plan weekends or something! And I could pick you up for the holidays and we’d drive back together. It’ll be so much fun,” Daniel rambles.   
  
He’s happy.  
He’s so happy that they can continue to be friends that Chris doesn’t have the heart to change all that.   
Because Daniel’s right, that _does_ sound fun.   
  
Why ruin their friendship?  
  
“That sounds _awesome_ ,” Chris grins. “I was afraid I’d have to pay someone to do my hair.”  
  
Daniel laughs. “As if I would let anyone else touch your hair.”   
  
He reaches out and runs his hand through Chris’s fringe.   
Chris’s breath lodges itself in his throat.  
  
This is the best choice, he tells himself.   
Staying friends makes them both happy.  
  
So why does it hurt so much?  
  
He takes a step back. “So,” he says, looking at the truck. “Do you need help moving your shit?”   
  
  


_ the end _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I finished the fic! 
> 
> ... and this is not the end, hihi! I'm so sorry for pulling that, I just had the thought of "what if i actually ended it like this?" In all honesty, it would fit with Life is Strange's way of ending stories....... 
> 
> Thanks for reading! ♡ It means a lot to know that you're having fun reading! And let me know what you thought, if you want!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovely people!!
> 
> Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry this update is late. Life was so busy, ahh! I hope you can forgive me and that you'll like the last chapter nonetheless :)
> 
> Enjoy!

_the first day of Christmas Break  
  
_ The university of San Diego looks bright and green, and is crowded with people lugging suitcases around and giving each other teary-eyed hugs.  
  
Chris takes a hesitant forward.  
He’s not entirely sure where to go from here.  
  
His heart is beating a nervous rhythm in his chest and his hands are kinda clammy.   
  
“Chris!”   
  
He turns to his right and there he is,   
a little more tan, but just as handsome and radiant as before.  
  
Daniel Diaz.   
  
Chris’s heart jumps.   
Finally, he can see his best friend in real life again and not through some screen—though the screen did have some benefits, namely that Chris could stare at Daniel all he wanted without it being obvious.  
  
Chris starts walking towards Daniel, but Daniel’s already sprinting like this is a soccer match and he’s aiming to score.  
Within seconds, Chris is enveloped in a big hug. Daniel presses him tightly against his chest, and the scent of laundry detergent hits Chris’s nose.   
It’s a different smell than before, but underneath the blue shirt is the same Daniel. Still running so hot that Chris feels sweaty within no time.  
  
Or maybe that’s partly due to something else.  
  
“I missed you,” Daniel says.   
  
His head is tucked in the crook of Chris’s neck  
and the words tickle on Chris’s skin.  
  
Emotions fill Chris up until he’s afraid he’s going to overflow.  
It’s a little hard to breathe.  
  
“I—” he starts.   
  
“Come on,” Daniel says, and he pulls back so suddenly Chris stumbles. “I want to show you my room!”  
  
x  
  
 _the first day of Christmas Break,_ _  
_ _a few minutes later_ _  
  
_Life had been hectic after moving to Pomona.  
Daniel had promised to help Chris decorate his room, but then classes had started sooner, and the drive was just a little too long to make in one day.   
  
Chris had promised to come to San Diego for the weekend, but then he’d gotten too ill to travel.  
  
Daniel had said they should celebrate Halloween at Chris’s, but there had been an assignment he _had_ to finish, so in the end Daniel stayed in San Diego.  
  
And so on.  
  
But now it was winter break,  
and they didn’t have anything to do for two blissful weeks.   
Aside from drive back home and see their families again and hang out as much as possible.  
  
Daniel fishes inside his pocket for a key then opens the door.   
  
“So this is me.”  
  
It’s messy.  
That’s Chris’s first thought.  
  
There’s shoes and sweatpants lying on the ground, peeking out from underneath the bed where Daniel very clearly tried to shove them in an attempt to clean up his room.   
On Daniel’s desk, there’s loose papers and pens, and a bunch of textbooks that look worse for wear.  
  
But the thing Chris is immediately drawn to is the wall besides Daniel’s badly made bed.  
It’s almost completely covered by drawings.   
  
At first, Chris thinks most are from Sean, but when he takes a step closer he can see that that’s not true. Nearly half of the drawings are made by _him_.   
  
“Cool, right?” Daniel says.  
  
“Yeah,” Chris says, only a little speechless. He had no idea Daniel treasured every little doodle. He spots some of the notes they passed in class, and even a few yellow post-it notes that have got to be at least four years old.  
  
He points at one where he tried to draw Daniel as Superwolf. “Oh, man, that looks awful. My art improved so much.”  
  
“Hey, I liked that drawing! It was one of the first you let me keep.”   
  
Chris is surprised Daniel remembers.   
He looks at his best friend, but Daniel is looking at the wall with a smile on his face.  
  
“It meant a lot to me back then,” Daniel continues. “That you saw me as a superhero.”  
  
“I still see you as a superhero.”  
  
Daniel looks at him. He seems to think about something. Then he grins and spreads his hands. Immediately, Chris’s ears pop and he hears a slight _hum_ in the air as the blankets start floating in the air.   
  
It never ceases to amaze him.  
  
“Woah,” he grins.   
  
And then he feels it.  
The slight tug at his body,   
like someone wrapped their arms around his midriff and starts pulling him up.   
  
Chris feels his feet leave the floor, but he’s not afraid.   
Though his stomach swoops and his heart races, he feels amazing.  
  
And besides, it’s not like he needs to fly in order to feel like that with Daniel around.  
  
Two invisible hands push against Chris’s back and he starts floating towards Daniel, who’s smiling up at him.  
Chris grins back.   
  
Slowly, gently, Chris feels himself start to float down.   
Daniel’s holding out his arms, like he wants to catch Daniel, but that’s not really what he’s going to do, is he?  
  
He is.  
  
When Chris is close enough, Daniel wraps his arms around Chris’s legs and pulls him against him. Chris puts his hand on Daniel’s shoulders to balance himself.  
  
“Wow,” he says.  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“Thanks.”  
  
Daniel smiles and he looks so handsome that it hurts.   
Chris wants to keep staring into his deep brown eyes and feel this close to him.  
  
“You always make me feel like a superhero,” Chris says, a little breathlessly.  
  
“Good,” Daniel says. “‘Cause you make me feel like one too.”  
  
Chris’s heart clenches in his chest.  
He loves Daniel so, so much.  
  
“What’s wrong?” Daniel asks, apparently reading Chris’s face like a comic book.  
  
And Chris can’t help it.   
He leans forward until their foreheads are touching,   
then closes his eyes.  
  
“Nothing,” he breathes. “Nothing is wrong now.”  
  
They stay like that for a while.  
Just breathing together.  
Just being together.  
  
After what feels like hours, but is in reality just a minute or so, Daniel says quietly, “Want to see the rest of my room?”   
  
Chris nods.   
Daniel puts him down, then starts giving the full tour. He has an explanation or story for nearly every item in the room, but that’s okay. Chris loves listening to him.  
  
And then Daniel opens the third drawer of his wardrobe.  
  
“And this is your drawer.”   
  
Chris blinks. “I’m sorry, what?”   
  
“This is your drawer,” Daniel repeats.   
  
“Why do I need a drawer in your room?”   
  
Daniel looks confused by Chris’s question.  
Chris, on the other hand, feels confused by the empty drawer.  
  
They stare at each other for a few seconds.  
  
“To put your things in?” Daniel says carefully. “When you come over?”   
  
That sorta makes sense, but.  
  
“Don’t you need that drawer?” Chris asks. “I could just bring a bag or something.”  
  
“Wouldn’t that be a hassle every month?”  
  
“Every month?”   
  
“Yeah?”   
  
“I didn’t know that was the plan,” Chris says slowly. “I mean, we could barely plan a date the last couple of months.”  
  
“Yeah, and that sucked ass,” Daniel says, frowning now. “So, wait, what are you saying? You don’t want to see me every month? I don’t get a drawer at your place?”  
  
“Of course I want to see you every month.”   
  
“But I don’t get a drawer.”  
  
“What the hell is up with the drawer?” Chris says, exasperated. “Why’s that so important?”   
  
Daniel looks at the ground. “Greyson’s girlfriend has a drawer.”   
  
_… And?  
  
_ “Okay?” Chris says, confused. “So? I’m not your girlfriend. I don’t need a drawer.”  
  
That seems to hurt Daniel.   
He takes a step back.  
  
“I know you’re not my girlfriend,” he mumbles.   
  
“I should hope so,” Chris says, confused about why the atmosphere has suddenly gotten tense. He tries to make a joke to lighten the mood. “I mean, if I was your girlfriend, I’d want to be asked. You know?”  
  
Daniel doesn’t laugh.  
He does, however, nod.  
  
It confuses the hell out of Chris.  
  
“Okay,” Daniel says finally. “Come on, we’ll grab lunch somewhere and then get on the road.”  
  
x  
  
 _the second day of Christmas break,  
_ _but very late  
  
_ After months away,  
both Captain Spirit and Superwolf are back at their home base.  
  
Car doors slam   
and snow crunches underneath their shoes  
as they get out of the car.  
  
“See,” Chris says. “ _This_ is what cold feels like.”  
  
“Oh god, yes,” Daniel says. “Everybody at campus kept complaining about how cold it was, but it was like, 60 degrees or something?”   
  
“Right! That’s not cold at all. That’s maybe... _chilly_ , at night, when you’re in your underwear.”   
  
Daniel laughs. “They’d barely leave the house if it was as cold as it is here.”  
  
“Yeah, or they’d be so bundled up scarves and gloves and hats they could barely move,” Chris adds, also laughing.  
  
The front door of the Reynolds’ home opens then, and out come Claire and Stephen with big smiles on their faces.  
  
“We thought we heard you boys,” Claire says, a second before she envelops first Chris and then Daniel into a hug.  
  
“Come on inside, boys,” Stephen says. He looks at Chris. “Your father is already here, Chris. We invited him over for tea.”  
  
“And cake?” Daniel pipes up.  
  
Claire laughs. “And cake.”  
  
x  
  
 _the seventh day of Christmas Break  
  
_ Life is pretty normal for the next couple of days.  
  
Chris and his father build Snowmancer again, they watch a game or two, they watch a movie or three, and they cook healthy dinners together. The in-between hours, Chris fills by drawing and playing video games.   
  
It’s almost like he never left Beaver Creek at all.  
There’s just one thing missing.  
Sleepovers with Daniel.  
  
It’s not like Daniel hasn’t asked. He has, multiple times. Through text, through chat, through Chris’s window in the early morning. That had made Chris laugh and shake his head fondly, but it hadn’t changed his answer.  
  
“No, sorry.”   
  
Because after months of being away from Daniel,  
Chris had lost his… well, cool.   
Not that he had that to begin with, so maybe _immunity_ would be a better word. He’d become a little immune to Daniel’s charm when they would see each other every day. But now… Now, every time Daniel smiles, Chris finds himself forgetting to breathe,   
forgetting to blink,  
forgetting to act like a best friend.   
  
It’s awkward.  
  
So Christmas comes and goes, and Chris has walked the path to the Reynolds’ home more times than he can count.   
  
“Why don’t you just stay over?” Claire had even said at some point.  
  
“No, thanks,” Chris had smiled. “I live like 2 seconds away, anyway.”  
  
With a sigh, Chris looks at the drawing in front of him.  
It’s a good drawing if you look at it from a technical point of view. It’s got background, perspective, and dynamic poses.  
If you look at it from a personal point of view however, it’s an embarrassing drawing of Captain Spirit and Superwolf making out in their homebase. Chris looks at Superwolf’s hand, slipping underneath Captain Spirit’s shirt, and feels his cheeks heat up.  
  
And then, of course, his dad shouts, “Chris! Daniel’s here.”   
  
You’d think that was enough time to stuff away the drawing, but it barely is. Daniel’s footsteps are already at his door before Chris can open his desk drawer.   
  
The door opens, and Chris slam-dunks the drawing into his drawer, then closes it so hard and clumsy his hand falls victim to his stress.  
  
“Hi,” Daniel says.  
  
“ _Fuck_ ,” Chris swears, cradling his hand to his chest.  
  
“Are you okay?” Daniel rushes to him. “What happened?”   
  
_Crap, he’s going to see the drawing_.  
  
“Nothing!” Chris groans, and he pushes against Daniel’s arms. “I’m fine, I’m fine.”  
  
To prove that he’s fine,   
he straightens up and plasters a somewhat forced smile on his face.  
  
Daniel looks unimpressed.  
  
“Were you drawing?”   
  
Chris’s head snaps to his desk. There’s still pencils and pens on his desk, and a layer of eraser dust in the shape of a square.  
  
“Uh,” Chris says. “No.”   
  
It’s so obviously a lie that he cringes.  
  
“So what’s that?” Daniel asks, and to Chris’s horror he reaches for the edge of the forbidden drawing that’s poking out of the drawer.  
  
Acting purely on instinct and panic, Chris grabs Daniel’s wrist.   
Daniel pauses.   
He looks surprised.   
  
“Uh,” Chris says. “It’s nothing important.”  
  
“That’s an extreme reaction for nothing important,” Daniel points out.  
  
“So why are you here?” Chris asks quickly.  
  
Daniel raises an eyebrow. His eyes dart to the corner of the drawing again. Chris is worried he’s going to reach for it, but he doesn’t. Instead Daniel says, “I wanted to hang out. I feel like I haven’t seen you in ages.”  
  
“We saw each other two days ago.”   
  
“So? We normally see each other every day. It kinda feels like... you’re avoiding me. You don’t want to have a sleepover, and now this. Is something wrong?”   
  
_Yeah, I don’t know how to hide that I’m in love with you.  
  
_ “Okay,” Chris says instead. “Let’s have a sleepover tonight.”  
  
Daniel’s eyebrows shoot up. “For real?”  
  
“Yeah.” Chris notices he’s still holding onto Daniel’s wrist, so he awkwardly lets go.  
  
“Okay. Okay,” Daniel repeats, but a smile is starting to overtake his face. “Cool.”   
  
x  
  
After Daniel has left, Chris drags himself to the living room.  
  
“Dad?”   
  
His dad reaches for the remote and mutes the cooking program he’s watching.   
  
“Can Daniel stay over tonight?”   
  
“Is there a reason why you don’t sound happy about that?” his dad asks.  
  
And there’s no particular reason why Chris decides that today is the day.   
He just pushes his hands into his eyes, lets out a miserable groan, and says, “Yeah. I’ve been in love with him for years and I don’t know how to hide that.”   
  
His dad lets out a laugh.   
  
“Don’t laugh at me,” Chris whines.  
  
“Sorry, sorry. I’m just impressed how long it’s taken you to tell me.”  
  
Chris drops his hands. “You knew?”   
  
His dad shrugs. “Son, don’t take this the wrong way, but I think Claire and Stephen know too.”   
  
_Holy crap_.  
  
Chris’s face heats up. “What? Why didn’t you talk about it?”   
  
“I figured I should wait until you were ready.”   
  
“Ready? What were you even planning to tell me?”  
  
His dad smiles. “That you’re wonderful the way you are, and Daniel knows that. That’s why he’s so careful with you.”   
  
“Careful?”   
  
“Well. He hasn’t tried to kiss you, has he?”   
  
For a second, Chris is transported back to Samantha Hunt’s going away party. Phantom hands grasp his hips, and the memory of a warm exhale brushes his neck.   
Goosebumps break out over Chris’s skin.  
  
“ _No_ ,” he says sharply. “Why would he? Daniel has never shown interests in guys.”   
  
“Oh, really? I thought he showed a lot of interest in one guy in particular.”   
  
It takes a second for Chris to get what he means.   
He feels so awkward that he nearly runs out of the room.  
  
“Dad,” he mumbles. “It’s not like that.”   
  
His dad gives him a look. “Okay, son.”  
  
“Really!”  
  
“Uh-huh.”   
  
x  
  
 _the seventh day of Christmas Break,  
_ _but late  
  
_ When the doorbell rings that evening, Chris’s heart lodges itself in his throat. His chest feels too tight, like he can hardly breathe, and it doesn’t let up when Daniel smiles at him, or when he closes his bedroom door behind them.   
  
But then Daniel sits on the bed and undoes his shoes,  
and he’s wearing Powerbear socks.   
  
And suddenly it hits Chris.  
This is Daniel.  
His best friend in the whole world.  
Superwolf.  
  
Finally, it feels like he can breathe again.  
  
“That’s a big sigh,” Daniel says, looking up.  
  
“Yeah,” Chris says. “It feels good to be back home.”   
  
Daniel looks confused. “But you’ve been home for a week?”   
  
“I know, but. I dunno, it feels more like home now that you’re staying over.”   
  
“Dude,” Daniel smiles. “Then why’d you say no all the time?”  
  
The question is too difficult to answer right now,  
so instead Chris walks over to his desk and grabs his laptop.   
  
“You want to watch a movie?”   
  
“Yes! Which one?”  
  
Chris stares at the list of movies on Netflix. Out of the corner of his eye, under ‘ _watch again_ ’, is a red cover with a moderately attractive guy.   
Chris remembers how wildly his heart had pounded when he’d first seen it.  
How it still clenched and hurt after the third time,  
and the fifth.  
  
Maybe…   
He told his father today and he was fine with it, so maybe.  
  
“How about _Love, Simon_?”   
  
“Oh,” Daniel says. “I love that movie!”   
  
Chris very nearly drops his laptop.  
  
x  
  
 _the seventh day of Christmas Break,  
_ _more than half-way through the movie  
  
_ “So I did whatever I could to keep my secret.”  
  
Chris looks at Daniel from the corner of his eye,   
but Daniel’s face is unreadable.  
  
“I hurt the best, the most important people, and I want them to know that I'm sorry. I am done being scared, I'm done living in a world where I don't get to be who I am. I deserve a great _love story_.”  
  
“You know,” Daniel says, and Chris quickly pretends he wasn’t already looking at him. “I’m glad you didn’t keep it a secret from me.”  
  
“Luckily, I wasn’t blackmailed to tell you before I was ready.”   
  
“That too.”   
  
Chris glances back at the screen,  
at Simon trying his best to fix his mistakes.   
  
“Everybody already knew though,” he says, thinking about all those casual comments that hurt like paper cuts. Too small to make a fuss about, but they hurt more than you’d think.  
  
“I didn’t,” Daniel says.   
  
Meanwhile, the movie’s still playing.   
Simon’s friends have forgiven him and now they’re wondering what he’s going to do about Blue, his mystery boy.   
  
_How could Daniel not have known while everyone else did?_  
  
Chris looks at their matching Powerbear socks; they’re both sitting cross-legged, their feet inches away from touching.   
  
When Chris came out, they were also wearing matching Powerbear socks.   
  
“How about…” Chris starts, but he chickens out. He can’t ask that of Daniel. Daniel never asked it of him.  
  
“Hm?”   
  
The ferris wheel scene isn’t so far off now.  
The first time Chris saw it, his heart lurched inside his chest and he was pretty sure he wasn’t breathing, not until Simon finally kissed his Blue.   
  
“I like that Simon talked about a ferris wheel, and now he’s actually going on one,” Daniel says.   
  
“Yeah.”   
  
“One minute I’m on top of the world, then the next I’m at rock bottom.”   
  
It’s surprising that Daniel remembers the quote.  
Did he watch the movie so many times, or… or did he recognize himself in Simon?  
  
 _“I was kinda waiting for somebody,”_ Simon says.  
  
 _“Yeah, I know._ ”   
  
The question is on Chris’s lips,   
but he can’t ask it, can he?  
  
“ _It’s you_.”  
  
“ _It’s me._ ”  
  
It’s just… Daniel doesn’t have to answer it, if he doesn’t want to.  
It won’t hurt to ask, right?  
  
“ _Are you disappointed that it’s me?_ ”  
  
And as soon as Simon says _no_ , they lean in, and it’s the kiss, the kiss that made Chris’s heart surge, and then Daniel’s saying, “Chris, were you dis—” at the same time that Chris just… blurts it out.  
  
“So are you straight?”   
  
Whatever Daniel wanted to say, he seems to forget about it. He turns to Chris with wide eyes.   
  
“What?”   
  
Chris feels his face heating up. “You don’t have to, like, answer me. It’s okay if you don’t know! I was just thinking that we never talked about your sexuality.”   
  
There’s cheering in the background.  
The movie, still playing.  
  
Meanwhile, Daniel’s face goes through a series of emotions, before settling on exasperation.  
  
“You’re right. We never talked about it.”   
  
“That’s okay,” Chris says quickly. “We don’t have to talk about it unless you’re ready.”  
  
“I’ve been ready for the past two years, I think.” Daniel shakes his head. “I just kinda assumed you knew. So dumb.”   
  
“No, no, it’s not dumb!”  
  
Daniel lets out a laugh. It sounds like he’s laughing at himself. “Well, I’m bi.”   
  
_Bi.  
  
_ It’s the word Chris dreaded hearing,   
the day Daniel would say bye and leave him alone.  
Turns out it’s not so bad.   
  
“But,” Chris splutters, heart racing in his chest, “you never talked about other boys.”  
  
Daniel looks at the screen, where Simon casually leans over and kisses his boyfriend good morning.   
  
“No, uh.” He pauses, then takes a deep breath. “It’s a little weird to talk to your crush about your crush... you know.”   
  
Chris stops breathing.  
  
He stares at Daniel,  
watches his body tense, his shoulders drawing up.  
  
“I know you don’t, um, like me like that,” Daniel says. “But, yeah.”   
  
Chris’s head is swimming and his vision is going blurry.  
He should probably breathe.  
Instead, he asks in a weak voice, “I don’t like you?”   
  
Daniel looks up. “Oh, no, I know you like me! Just not like that. You said it yourself, right? The night I confessed. You said that wasn’t the way you wanted me to like you.”   
  
Chris’s mind scrambles to remember what Daniel had said the night of Samantha Hunt’s party.  
  
 _“Chris, I like you.”_ _  
_ _  
_And Chris had said, _“Not in the way I want you to.”_ _  
_  
Like a dumbass.  
  
“I thought you meant as friends,” Chris says weakly.   
  
“What?”   
  
“I thought…” Chris needs to breathe, he needs to take a deep breath, that’s it. And another one. “I thought you were cheering me up. As a friend. I thought you meant as a friend, I thought you were feeling sorry for—”  
  
Daniel kisses him.  
  
The kiss is so short that Chris doesn’t have time to close his eyes before Daniel already leans back, looking downright _scared_.  
  
“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he says. “I should’ve asked.”  
  
Chris wheezes.   
His heart is pounding so loudly he can feel his entire body rock back and forth from the impact.  
  
“Sorry, I should’ve asked if you liked me.”   
  
“Like you?” Chris repeats faintly. The question is almost funny. “I’ve been in love with you my whole life.”   
  
It takes a second for his words to hit. When they do, a huge smile spreads over Daniel’s face. “You have?”   
  
Chris nods.   
His lips are still faintly tingling, because _holy crap_ Daniel kissed him.  
  
“Can you do that again?” he asks. “Before I pass out.”   
  
“What? Are you gonna pass out?” Daniel asks, worried. “Are you okay?”   
  
Instead of answering, Chris puts his hand on the back of Daniel’s neck and pulls him closer.   
Their faces are so close that he can feel Daniel’s breath against his lips.  
  
“I’m okay.”   
  
“Okay,” Daniel says. He’s looking at Chris like he’s a falling star, and it’s too much, so Chris closes his eyes and that’s perfect, because Daniel takes the hint and kisses him again.  
  
His lips are dry and warm,  
so very different from Mikey Jones’s kiss.  
  
The laptop floats away from Chris’s lap,   
not that Chris pays it any mind.

Not until Daniel shifts.  
It’s so easy to lie back on the bed while Daniel crawls over him, their lips never seperating for more than an agonizing second.  
  
When the kiss deepens, it gets a little wet. Daniel’s tongue is in his mouth, but it’s not bad.   
Not bad at all.   
It’s the kind of wet that has Chris gasping for air, has his hands tightening in Daniel’s hair, and his hips shifting up, up, up.  
  
Daniel groans when Chris accidentally grinds against him.  
The sound feels like being struck by lightning.  
It’s super hot.  
  
Daniel leans back a little. His eyes are so, so dark. “Are we going too fast?”   
  
“I’ve wanted this for forever,” Chris pants. “I’ve drawn us kissing so many times.”   
  
Understanding crosses Daniel’s face. “The drawing this morning.”   
  
“Yeah.”   
  
“So what did you draw?”   
  
Face heating up, Chris says, “I’d rather show you.”   
  
When Daniel nods, Chris takes his hand and hesitatingly places it under his shirt. Luckily, Daniel’s hand is warm. Daniel’s always been hot.   
  
Super inappropriately, Chris laughs.  
  
“What?” Daniel asks, alarmed, and he pulls back his hand.   
  
“Nothing, nothing. I just… I was just thinking that you’re hot.”   
  
A faint blush colors Daniel’s cheeks. He looks kinda shy, which is surprising, even though Chris has known Daniel for long enough to know Daniel isn’t aware of how good he looks.  
  
“You’re very hot too,” Daniel mumbles.   
  
“What?”   
  
“Why’d you think Mikey Jones was making a move on you?”   
  
The question comes a little out of left field.  
  
“Maybe he likes me for my personality?” Chris shrugs.  
  
Daniel rolls his eyes. “You know what I mean! You looked super hot at the party. He was _ogling_ you the entire time.”   
  
Wait, how did Daniel know?  
Wasn’t he busy talking to Samantha?  
  
“And were you jealous?” Chris jokes, but Daniel looks away with a pout and _holy crap._ “No way, you _were_!”   
  
“Shut up!”   
  
“That’s why you pulled me away,” Chris says, surprised.  
  
Embarrassed, Daniel starts to sit up.   
  
“No, wait, come back. Sorry, I didn’t want to be mean. Let’s get back to kissing?”   
  
“You weren’t,” Daniel says. He leans forward again. “But I will take you up on that.”   
  
They’re both smiling as their lips connect,  
and it’s the best kiss of Chris’s entire life.  
  
x  
  
 _the second to last day of Christmas Break,  
_ _or: leaving Beaver Creek again  
  
_ Chris zips up his suitcase, now filled to the brim with clothes, shoes, and Christmas presents. Including his new paint brush set.  
  
There’s a knock on the door.   
  
“You ready to go?” his dad asks. His voice sounds a little rough.   
  
“Yeah,” Chris says, lifting his suitcase from his bed. “All packed up.”   
  
“Good. So, uh, you already know what I’m going to say. Do your homework, study hard and don’t stay up too late Skyping with your boyfriend.”   
  
Chris’s cheeks heat up. “Dad!”  
  
His dad smiles. “Alright, give me a hug.”   
  
Chris does.   
It’s a tight hug, like his father wants to choke them both,  
and Chris realizes his father probably misses him just as much.  
  
“Love you, dad,” Chris mumbles.  
  
“Yeah,” his dad grunts. “I love you too, son.”   
  
When they part, his dad immediately reaches for his suitcase and carries it towards the door. Chris quickly wipes at his eyes, then follows him outside.   
  
Parked between their houses is Daniel’s rickety old car, rumbling low like it’s impatient. The doors are open, so Chris’s dad lifts the suitcase in the trunk. And then it’s time to say goodbye. Again.   
  
Chris feels the same tightness in his chest,  
the same burning behind his eyes,  
but some of it eases when Daniel walks towards them, his own suitcase rolling behind him.   
  
“How’s it going, Mr. Eriksen?”   
  
“Hey, Daniel.”  
  
“Okay, dad,” Chris says. “Time to say goodbye.”   
  
His dad nods. “Have fun at school. And call me when you arrive, okay?” Then he turns to Daniel. “Be careful on the road, okay? And don’t forget our little talk.”   
  
_Talk?_  
  
Confused, Chris turns to see Daniel nod seriously. Apparently, he _does_ know what his dad means.   
  
Before he can ask, his father slaps him on his back one more time and then he starts back to the house. He’s bad at saying goodbye.  
  
Daniel and Chris get in the car.   
  
“What did he mean with ‘little talk’?”  
  
“Oh, it’s nothing,” Daniel says cheerily.   
  
Chris squints. “You sure?”  
  
“Yep. ‘Cause I don’t plan on doing any of that.”  
  
Part of Chris is too curious to let it go, but they’re almost out of Beaver Creek and he doesn’t want to miss the moment they leave.   
His heart clenches as he sees the wooden sign and the little beaver coming closer.  
  
“There we go again,” he whispers.  
  
Daniel reaches for his hand. “Don’t be sad. We’ll come back. This is where our awesome origin story began, after all.”   
  
Nearly 10 years ago,  
when the ladder hadn’t held and Chris’s world had been spinning,  
but then Daniel—Superwolf—caught him. _  
_ _  
_“Yeah,” Chris smiles.  
  
x

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh, it's the end for real now! 
> 
> I had so much fun writing this fic. It definitely helped me process all my Life is Strange 2 feelings, haha. I also immediately got to thinking how Chris and Daniel's relationship would progress in the low morality route... Which was my original playthrough btw! 
> 
> ANYWAY. Thank you so much for reading! AND for commenting. It's been wonderful getting to hear what you thought :) So if you want, you can tell me one last time. 
> 
> I hope you have a nice day/evening!


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